About Me

My photo
Kennesaw, Georgia, United States
My name is Billie, I am a 43 year old mother of two. I have been mostly losing the battle of the bulge for the past 20+ years, now I'm ready to lose it for good. Come along on my journey to beat the battle.
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
Phil 4:13

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

My very first award, Thanks so much to Tammy at Fat to Fab. I love it.

Now I'm supposed to pass it on to 7 people who are deserving. This is hard because I feel all are deserving.

But here goes:

Kandice @ No more Chunky Dunking, time to Skinny Dip
Georgia Mist @ Gathering My Roses
Dawne @ 365 Days to a New Me
MaryFran @ A New Start: Losing Weight
Tina @ Fat Girl Dives In
What A Splurge
Amy @ The Not So Secret Life of a Not So Super Together Mom

And then I have to tell 6 interesting things about myself.....lets see.

1) I love dogs - I have 5 - All were rescued.
2) I have been married and divorced twice.
3) I have been on every diet known to woman.
4) I actually used to work out with a trainer - I still remember some things.
5) I have had the same job for 20 years.
6) I hate being alone, but I love being alone.


Now on to the blog...

Lets see its been forever since I posted, well not forever, but seems like it.

This has been a weird week, hectic and tiring.

Weigh In was Friday (Changed from Saturday), gained a pound. Not too bad but was hoping for a loss.

Saturday morning 3:30 Shane's mom calls to say his dad was rushed to the emergency room and had coded. They brought him back, but his heart kept spiking and they couldn't stabilize him. So he was admitted to the hospital.

Sunday we were to go to Tammy's mom's retirement party in Ellijay. Had my oatmeal for breakfast, went to the hospital, forgot about lunch, saved my calories for the party - Chicken & Potato Salad, then got an unexpected call shortly after we arrived saying they had to shock Shane's dad again. So we flew to the hospital, and I missed dinner. By the time we left it was just too late to eat dinner, so I had a small bowl of Special K and went to bed.

All this also meant no time for workout.

Monday, had to go back to work. I was so tired and slept through the alarm, which meant no workout on the way to work. I did well with Breakfast and Lunch at work, and I think I had enough water. Went to the hospital to see Dad. He had a Heart Cath today. Late getting home again, so no dinner.

Tuesday, work again, still tired, slept through the alarm again. So no workout on the way to work again. Did well with Breakfast and Lunch at work. Then back to the hospital to see Dad. Late getting home again, but was hungry. Found some mini candy bars in the pantry (that Shane left), so I ate 4 of them. Probably not a good idea that late at night.

Wednesday, work again, woke up when the alarm went off, but couldn't get up because I was so tired. Breakfast was good, but started getting nauseous by lunch, so I skipped lunch. Dad had a heart ablasion (sp?) today, where they burned off the dead parts of his heart. He came through the procedure great. I didn't go to the hospital tonight because I was still feeling nauseous and I don't want to give Dad anything, just in case it's a stomach virus. But I also did not go workout.

I plan to start working out again on Friday, hopefully. I just feel like I need to be with Shane and his family during this time, so it's hard to get in everything that needs to be done.

So now I'm sitting here at home, not really feeling like eating but I ate a grilled cheese sandwich. And now I'm off to bed.

Quote for the Day - There is abundant testimony that if we choose love rather than self, we gain immeasurably.





Thursday, October 22, 2009

ONE MONTH - Battle of the Bulge

As of yesterday, I have been on this journey for a month. I will however, do my one month weigh in on Friday. So we will see how GOOD I have done then. No matter what it is it is all GOOD. I feel that just my moving more is a great accomplishment, and I feel good, so it's gotta be good.

Tammy and I joined the gym yesterday. Yes I know I just joined a gym a week or so ago, but it's better to do it with someone. It is great, because it's more motiviation. I only join month to month gyms, no long term contract. So I will cancel the other membership.

Last night we worked on the machines and only did 1 rep of 15 each, and then walked on the treadmill. I am very motivated working out with Tammy. She has been at this a little longer than I have so she's more advanced at the walking/jogging than I am. I think I was just lucky she hurt her knee and wasn't going 4 miles last night...lol. We did 2.2 or so, I was ready to stop at 1, but I kept going, and I felt so accomplished when I was done. I will start incorporating the jogging into my walking soon, I was walking faster last night and I probably could have jogged some but that will come soon enough.

I have been working at home this week and it is much harder to keep track of what I'm eating. I am aware, but there are so many more choices. When I'm at work I pack my food to take with me, and that's all there is, no extra munchies. And I do not visit the vending machines, I steer clear of that room at all costs. At home there's way too much to tempt me, and knowing the groceries have to last two weeks does not usually deter me. I actually bought some 100 calorie Weight Watchers lemon cakes, and I have not even opened them, talk about will power.

I also find I don't drink as much water when I'm at home for some reason. I just get busy and don't go to the fridge and get it. At work I'm looking at the computer all day, so I have to just walk away sometimes and that is when I go and refill my water bottle.

But all in all my food hasn't been that bad this week, I actually only bought good food when I got groceries. My son of course has to have not so good food, because he's a growing boy, but the next two weeks he's gonna eat good.

So I haven't really been counting my calories, I just kinda keep a running total in my head. Which right now is getting to be tough, I have so many numbers running in my head...I try not to think of much when I'm not working because there are so many numbers I work with, it just makes my head hurt.

So for yesterday, food was good, water not bad. Today so far had my Oatmeal, 12 grain toast and a banana, and a bottle of water. So far so good.

Gotta get to work now, more later.






Saturday, October 17, 2009

Battle of the Bulge - Day 27 - WEIGH DAY

WooHoo I am down 4 pounds this week, down to 209. That makes 13 total lost. Not too bad for mother nature rearing her ugly head also. I was hoping for more, but I'll take it.

Today was not a bad day entirely. I did well with breakfast, Oatmeal and a Banana. Lunch was Spinach & Shrimp Quesadilla on Wheat tortilla. But then, we went to church and the Coffee Bar was a callin' me...because it was so cold. So I had a Dark Raspberry Mocha which is, oh heck I have no idea how many calories but I know its not good. AND not only did I have one, but during the half hour wait for the second service (while Shane is doing the parking duty) I had to have another one. SO two Dark Raspberry Mochas in one day, is probably way over my calories. BUT I did make a delicious dinner which was only 327 calories, Creamy Chicken & Wild Rice which I put in the crock pot and simmered all day.

AND I did not work out today. I had every intention of working out, drove to the gym and the power was out. Couldn't even get in. And we were looking for Shane a new car today, so I didn't get back by there later in the day. But I did drink lots of water.

Plan for tomorrow - Work out in the morning, make homemade pizza for lunch and Prayer Meeting tomorrow night where we are having Chicken Spaghetti. Water, Water and more water.







Friday, October 16, 2009

Battle of the Bulge - Day 26

So to start out my morning today, my alarm goes off and I was prepared to get up early and go workout. I turned on the news while I was waking up, and the power went off. I looked out the window to see if other lights were off in the neighborhood, and I could have sworn I saw a light shining in my bedroom window. I went to the door, and saw nothing. I think it was just the guy up the street walking his dogs. Turns out the power went off on my street for some reason. But this did not deter me from my mission at hand, I got a candle, took my shower and went to the gym. Walked my mile and 5 minutes on the elliptical before going to work.

While I was at the gym today I saw a paper on eating fiber to lose fat, which was exactly what I thought I was doing, but as noted in my post the other day, sometimes this is not pretty. As I am reading it says "Just heed the warnings: take it slow if you don't eat much fiber. Adding too much fiber at one time can cause bloating, gas and other uncomfortable stomach problems." What warning?? There were no warnings given to me. I go on to read about the fiber and how to get more fiber into your diet without even trying. And it appears that apples, bananas & popcorn fall into this category. So not only was I having the FiberOne Muffin with my oatmeal, but I was also having a banana. Then I have apples and popcorn for my snack. No wonder I exploded. The only thing I can say is I better lose some weight this week.

I have found that EVERYTHING has sodium in it, even milk. Since I have been counting calories, I look carefully at the sodium content, and I am very surprised at the sodium levels in everything. Why does everything have sodium? I have never cooked with salt, and if I buy canned vegetables I always buy the ones with no salt added.

I have NSVs to report also.

When I bought milk this week, my son was with me, and I reached for the 1% milk because I'm trying to get the kids down to the skim without shock. My son says to me, "why don't you just get the skim? we used to always get that". Which is right, I had actually raised the kids on skim milk, but when I got married my husband did not like skim, and we had to go to 2%.

I pulled my jacket out of the closet today and went to zip it up and it actually fit, without being snug. Last year I wouldn't zip it up because the elastic band at the bottom came right under my belly and made me look pregnant. Now it just hangs. I was so excited.

ALSO, I got my jeans out last weekend, and they actually fit. I haven't worn these jeans in over a year. My son actually asked me one time why I always wore jeans that had elastic in it, and all I could say was "Because I'm fat, and they are comfortable". My jeans are no longer tight and I can breathe when I sit down.

I think I stayed within my calories today, I have not tracked the past three days, but I am conscious of what what I'm eating and running the calories in my head. It is much easier to do it on the computer, but I have been so busy with work, that I haven't had time to figure it up.

So I'm hoping for at least 3 pounds when I weigh in tomorrow. I'll post then and let ya know. For now, I am so tired and I am ready to go to bed.


Myspace Quotes, Positive Quotes at WishAFriend.com

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Do I Really Look Like That?

I watched the Biggest Loser last night, and I'm looking at them at the weigh in and some of them weigh what I weigh, and I'm saying to myself I don't look like that...but then who actually thinks they look as fat and flabby as they really do. And the sports bras and bicycle shorts...I wouldn't be caught outside my house, let alone on national tv, in my shape. AND...I don't think I would kill myself working out like they do, I mean really push, push, push then pass out??? I guess that's why I won't lose that big 8 or 16 pounds in a week. My daughter actually wanted us to try out for that show at one time, and I considered it for about...until I actually watched the show, and then no way am I going to punish myself like that.

So I say to myself...Is that really what I look like? and self says YES, yes you do look like that, and you need to do something about it. My self is always brutally honest...lol

Yesterday I worked out before work - 1 mile on the treadmill and 30 crunches. I'm pressed for time on my way to work, which is the reason I only do one mile.
Then I stopped again on my way home - only 2 miles on the treadmill and 15 minutes on the elliptical.

Today I did not work out - I took the day off from working out, but I'll be back at it in the morning.

My calorie count yesterday was good. I'm trying to work more into my menu, so I can at least get the 1500 calories for consistency. However, the past two mornings I have had a FiberOne blueberry muffin, which are very delicious. Now, I usually need a little more fiber, and usually fiber in foods don't work, but dang, those muffins worked and by the 1 hour ride home, I was regretting the fiber from today. Had to stop half way home, and thought I would not make it, but thankfully did.

Now I'm off to bed, tired today.

Quote of the day - and this is hit right at home, because of my little talk with self last night.

Don't undermine your worth by comparing yourself with others. It is because we are different that each of us is special.




Monday, October 12, 2009

I've Been Doing it all wrong

I had a very eye opening day today. I went to the gym for my fitness and nutrition consultation. I learned alot about me during this consult.
1. I can walk a mile on the treadmill at 3.5 mph in only 17 minutes and not die.

2. I am not eating enough calories. She says I need to be eating between 1650 and 1900. Dear Lord, how do you eat that many calories and lose weight. I'd have to eat 5 300 calorie meals a day and have 5 100 calorie snacks. I'm having a tough time getting in 1500 every day.

3. My BMI is 42.55% and it should be 22 to be healthy. (I knew this was not going to be good)

4. I have a poor heart rate. Walking a mile at 3.5 mph my heart rate was only 126 and it should be 141-150 to effectively burn calories.

5. Strength training really hurts. I guess it's not supposed to, but...when you haven't really done any in a long time, it hurts.

6. And the real shocker...I am obese. (Ok I already knew that too)

So it appears that the 2.5 miles I walk in an hour is really not that good. I thought I was burning calories, but apparently I am not. I thought the point was to eat less and move more, but I think I may have been wrong on that point also.

Now not to mention, mother nature is paying a visit, and I feel like crap and don't really feel like working out. But the fatty me would just stay in bed and use this as an excuse, but the skinny me will be pushing on and go and work out and do at least a mile at 3.5, then I may slow down a little, cuz I thought my leg was gonna fall off.

I have decided that when I get to the 10 pound lost marker - I am buying the armband for my IPhone so I have no more mishaps with the flying phone. So hopefully I am hitting the 10 pound mark this week.
Free Calorie Counter
my-calorie-counter.com
Cal Fat Sat Chl Sod Crb Fib Sug Pro
Breakfast
1cupMilk, nonfat, fluid, with added vitamin A (fat free or skim)83005103120128
1servingOatmeal150310027415
2333151033941313
Lunch
1servingWeight Watchers Smart Ones - Angel Hair Marinara23041064040479
23041064040479
Dinner
1Serving - 311 GHEALTHY CHOICE DINNER - DINNER - CHICKEN PARMIGIANA 11 OZ BOX32093206004061020
32093206004061020
Snack
11 ContainerFiber One Vanilla Yogurt500005513543
1Serving - 38 GORVILLE REDENBACHER'S - MICROWAVE POPCORN - SMART POP BUTTER 94% FAT FREE 3 OZ 3 PK BOX11020036026604
1cupGrapes, red or green (European type, such as Thompson seedless), raw1040003271231
2642004186612278
Water Tracker
Totals
Target
Balance
1047
1500
453
18
65
47
5
20
15
25
300
275
1761
2400
639
185
300
115
26
25
1
57
50
7
50
50
0
CalFatSatChlSodCrbFibSugPro
Activity
Totals0

Quote of the day - Acceptance is not submission; it is acknowledgement of the facts of a situation. Then deciding what you're going to do about it.


Sunday, October 11, 2009

Check out my daughter's weight loss blog too.

She needs motivation and encouragement.

Battle of the Bulge - Day 21

The weekend is always very busy for me, because I work all week and don't have time to do anything around the house. My boyfriend spends most weekends with me, so I am cooking for him, but he's pretty much conditioned to eating low fat, low calorie foods so he's good with that. If he wants something that's not necessarily healthy, I'll make it for him and I'll make me something else, but this really doesn't happen alot. Since I have started working out I get up make breakfast go work out while he catches up on his emails or whatever it is he's doing on his computer, then we get on with our day.

Today I worked out this morning, 2.5 miles on the treadmill and 30 crunches and then this afternoon my son wanted to go for a bike ride. Now I do not own a bike, so I walked. We went to the Allatoona Pass trail, the trail is out 1.25 miles and then back, for a total of 2.5 miles. Now I know why I do the treadmill at the gym, because I just wouldn't do that everyday. There are rocks that you step on and twist your ankle, mosquitoes, gnats, etc. I mean don't get me wrong I love nature, I just think nature does not love me. I am more for the modern conveniences.

I can really tell I've been working out in my legs and my back. So all in all for today I did 5 miles, I think it may be easier to do it at two different times, then it doesn't seem like it's all that much at once.

So Yay for the exercise part of my day.

My foods for the day, still staying under my calorie limit of 1500. So its just been an all around good day.

Free Diet Log
my-calorie-counter.com
Cal Fat Sat Chl Sod Crb Fib Sug Pro
Breakfast
1servingOatmeal150310027415
1cupMilk, nonfat, fluid, with added vitamin A (fat free or skim)83005103120128
2333151033941313
Lunch
1servingOven Roasted Turkey Breast9052306802019
1servingSmall Tortilla10031029016113
1servingSwiss Cheese11090301300008
0.5servingRaspberry Ginger Ale7000030190190
3701736011303712120
Dinner
11 meal 10.5 oz Healthy Choice® - Traditional Turkey Breasts - frozen entree32052306004952320
32052306004952320
Snack
1Serving - 38 GORVILLE REDENBACHER'S - MICROWAVE POPCORN - SMART POP BUTTER 94% FAT FREE 3 OZ 3 PK BOX11020036026604
11 ContainerFiber One Vanilla Yogurt500005513543
1servingSuper Fruit Cup7000010182141
2302004255713188
Water Tracker
Totals
Target
Balance
1153
1500
347
27
65
38
6
20
14
95
300
205
2258
2400
142
182
300
118
23
25
2
75
50
25
61
50
11
CalFatSatChlSodCrbFibSugPro
Activity
Totals0

Well it has been a long day, and I am so tired so I'm headed to the shower and then to bed. Don't forget to check out my daughter's blog (listed in my blog roll) No more Chunky Dunking time to Skinny Dip.

My quote - One of the greatest tragedies of the average person is the tendency to spend our whole lives perfecting our faults.

Battle of the Bulge - Day 20

I weigh in on Saturday, but did not blog yesterday, so the scale said 213, so I'm down .5 for this week or a total of 9 pounds. I didn't get to exercise yesterday, although I could have, I had many things to do around the house and then church. So I just didn't get there. I know just another excuse. However, I got up this morning, ate breakfast and went and worked out. Walked 2.5 miles on the treadmill and did 30 crunches.

I really must get an armband for my Ipod, as I'm walking on the treadmill today, really getting into the walking, great song, 35 minutes in - I snag the cord and my phone flies across the room. Luckily there was only one other person there so not much embarrassment, but it distracted from the rest of the workout.

I am also very excited that my daughter has started a blog also, "No more CHUNKY DUNKING, time to skinny dip!" so everybody go check her out and follow her, she needs the motivation.

That's all for now, got things to do, be back later with my calorie log.

Quote for day - When we dream alone, it is only a dream. But when we dream together, it is the beginning of a new reality.

Friday, October 9, 2009

Battle of the Bulge - Day 19

I did it...I actually got up early today and went to the gym before work. I walked a mile on the treadmill and did 5 minutes on the ellipitical. Then after work I stopped there on my way home and walked a mile and a half and did 10 minutes on the ellipitical. Now I'm pooped.

I must say that I love my boyfriend so much. He is so encouraging. He doesn't tell me that he loves me just the way I am and I don't need to lose weight, but he doesn't tell me I don't either. He just cheers me on with my endeavors. I think this is the reason I would lose and gain back before, I never had anyone who just cheered me on. They either told me I didn't need to lose weight or they criticized me. I am very happy in my relationship and I think that really helps me with my daily weight loss. We had talked about me working out in the mornings before I go to work, and he said I should probably work up to it. But this morning I got up 30 minutes earlier and just did it. I was so excited I had to text him as soon as I got done, and he said "Cool, you go babe". I just love him.

I did good with my calories today. I haven't figured them all up yet, but I made the best jambalya tonight. I used brown rice instead of white and used turkey kiebasa instead of beef. The boyfriend loved it.

I weigh in tomorrow, so we'll see if the day of exercise burned enough calories to have a loss.


Quote for the day - If you don't know what you want, you won't recognize it when you get it.

Thursday, October 8, 2009

I DID IT !!! I DID IT !!!

I did it, today I joined the gym. I joined a 24 hour gym so I have no excuses not to go. It's a month to month, no contract membership, so if things go awry with my job, I can still get out of it. Which was a big concern to me right now. My job that is, because our company is being sold and no jobs are guaranteed.

I will start tomorrow on my way home with at least walking on the treadmill and doing some elliptical. Ideally I would like to stop on my way to work and on my way home, but I don't know if I can actually do that. We'll see how it goes, but I think I should start slow and work my way up. I haven't actually done any physical exertion in probably 4 years.

I did have a comment on my earlier blog about working out at home. Thank you for your comment, however, that's just not me. I really don't have a lot of room, and I have a teenage son who thinks its very funny to see mom flailing around the house alleging it is a workout, so I just wouldn't do it. I have all the videos, the balls, the stretching bands, just can't bring myself to do it.

My calories are still good, and I feel with the added exercise I will be able to succeed.

My Food Journal -

Free Diet Tracker
my-calorie-counter.com
Cal Fat Sat Chl Sod Crb Fib Sug Pro
Breakfast
1cup, quartered or choppedApples, raw, with skin650001173130
1servingOatmeal150310027415
1cupMilk, nonfat, fluid, with added vitamin A (fat free or skim)83005103120128
2983151045672613
Lunch
1servingLean Cuisine Baja-Style Chicken Quesadilla2808320690348318
2808320690348318
Dinner
1servingMoe's Naked Triple Lindy525221212012053715238
525221212012053715238
Snack
1cupGrapes, red or green (European type, such as Thompson seedless), raw1040003271231
1040003271231
Water Tracker
Totals
Target
Balance
1207
1500
293
33
65
32
16
20
4
145
300
155
2002
2400
398
154
300
146
31
25
6
54
50
4
70
50
20
CalFatSatChlSodCrbFibSugPro
Activity
Totals0

My Quote for the day - Most of the critical things in life, which become the starting points of human destiny, are little things.