Let the skinny ME out

Temptation

2011-01-18T13:36:00.001-05:00

The First Temptation

"And [the serpent] said to the woman, 'Indeed, has God said, 'You shall not eat from any tree of the garden?'" - Genesis 3:1

Let's talk about temptation. Go back to the big one, the first one - the Devil tempting Eve in the Garden of Eden. Have you ever read the passage in Genesis 3? Note what he does.

1. He raises questions about the trustworthiness of God's Word.

2. The seeds of doubt are planted in Eve's mind.

3. When Eve says she's not to eat of the fruit or she'll die, the Devil replies cunningly, "You surely shall not die."

The ultimate liar accuses God of lying. He makes his word seem true and God's Word seem unbelievable.

Think about temptation in your own life. It usually means believing your way is better than God's way. For Eve and for all of us, when we begin to doubt the Bible is reliable for living life the best way, we begin to give into temptation--we buy into the lies and half-truths of the world.

For Eve and for all of us, it leads to spiritual death. Decide to believe God's Word--it is the best way. Ask God to give you strength to live it and resist temptation

Whatever happened to Thanksgiving????

2010-11-15T12:30:00.005-05:00

Why is it that Thanksgiving is becoming a lost holiday in the commercialization of all the holidays? I went to Dunkin Donuts over the weekend to get pumpkin donuts for church. I get donuts or some sort of treat to go with the coffee at church every week. I always do a theme for the seasons. So it's fall we need fall treats. I started in October getting a different fall treat every week, mini cupcakes with fall leaf sprinkles, munchkins (from Dunkin Donuts) with fall colored sprinkles, you get the picture. So I had had the pumpkin donuts when they first came out, and had bought some for work, and I thought were great,so I was waiting until closer to Thanksgiving to get them for church. Can you believe it, it is only the middle of November and pumpkin donuts are out of season??? What has the world come to? Pumpkin is a Thanksgiving treat, not a Halloween treat. And Dunkin Donuts does not even have the munchkins with the fall sprinkles either anymore. What happened to Thanksgiving??? Why is it a lost holiday?? With all the commercialization now a days everyone skips from Halloween and goes directly to Christmas. Is it really that important to get a whole extra months jump on the Christmas season, just to sell more useless stuff to people who can't afford it in the first place.

Thanksgiving Traditions

In many American households, the Thanksgiving celebration has lost much of its original religious significance; instead, it now centers on cooking and sharing a bountiful meal with family and friends. Turkey, a Thanksgiving staple so ubiquitous it has become all but synonymous with the holiday, may or may not have been on offer when the Pilgrims hosted the inaugural feast in 1621. Today, however, nearly 90 percent of Americans eat the bird—whether roasted, baked or deep-fried—on Thanksgiving, according to the National Turkey Federation. Other traditional foods include stuffing, mashed potatoes, cranberry sauce and pumpkin pie. Volunteering is a common Thanksgiving Day activity, and communities often hold food drives and host free dinners for the less fortunate.

AND PUMPKIN PIE !!!! See Pumpkin has always been a Thanksgiving thing...

BUT Anyhow, enough of that rant.

My food has not been great lately, been under a huge amount of stress and been eating my way through it. I haven't exercised in a week and a half, but I am going to go to the gym tomorrow.

I made it through one Thanksgiving dinner, and it was not too bad. Two more to go, and then it's on to Christmas. Although Christmas at our house does not center around food all that much, there are all the darn holiday parties where you have to have snackey foods and you must at least have a glass of wine, which we all know is just empty calories.

Erma Bombeck, No One Diets on Thanksgiving
What we're really talking about is a wonderful day set aside on the fourth Thursday of November when no one diets. I mean, why else would they call it Thanksgiving?

May your stuffing be tasty
May your turkey plump,
May your potatoes and gravy
Have nary a lump.
May your yams be delicious
And your pies take the prize,
And may your Thanksgiving dinner
Stay off your thighs!

Thanksgiving just around the corner

2010-11-11T13:37:00.003-05:00

I just came to the realization that Thanksgiving is only two weeks away. I am doing Thanksgiving three times this year, so weight loss may not be in the forefront of my mind. I have a dinner this Saturday for church, and you know how church people eat. Then Tuesday before Thanksgiving we are having dinner at work. Then of course THE Thanksgiving dinner with family. Although this year it won't be that big. Just Shane and I, hopefully the kids will come and the in-laws. Shane's dad really hasn't been feeling that well, but he says he will try to eat with us. This is also the reason it will be relatively small. My family does not live close and the ones that do have their own things planned, and Shane's family doesn't live close either (except Mom & Dad).

I have worked out exactly twice since joining the gym two weeks ago. Getting a slow start, but I'm starting. Next year by this time, I'm going to do a half marathon, so I gotta get on it. I haven't worked out this week, but hoping to get back at it on Monday. I am so busy with church, work and family that any free time I have, exercise is not the first thing I want to do. I know it should be, but really isn't.

Shane and I went on a marriage retreat last weekend. It was really great. The only thing we had to pay for was our food (which was not cheap either). It was just a great time for us to get away and leave all our problems at home.

Biggest Loser this week, they sent home two players. And of course they were two good players. Bob visited them at their house after the show and they had continued to lose weight and looked great. I wonder if anyone actually goes home and doesn't lose any weight. That would be a little embarrassing, I would think. And why do these people always cry when they leave, it's a game and somebody's gotta go home. Oh I would probably cry too, just cuz I'm emotional like that.

Trying to decide if I want to jump back on the wagon before the holidays or wait til after. My boss suggested that we do a biggest loser here in the office starting the first of the year. That sounds like a great plan to me. Tammy and I are already on board. I know he wants to get the guys in better shape, but we can do better because we know how and we know what we need to do.

My water has been better today, and I really didn't do too bad with my eating...oh wait, I did finish off the pumpkin loaf Tammy made me this week. But i had my 90 calorie pimento cheese on 100 calorie sandwich thin for snack and two 120 calorie tuna salad on 100 calorie sandwich thin for lunch. Back to my oatmeal for breakfast tomorrow, so I'm going to be on a better track. I also have a pumpkin latte addiction right now, but I do not stop at Starbuck, I make my own, with pumpkin spice coffee, 4 calories per cup X2 (large cup) 1/4 c skim milk and 2 splenda packets. So it's very calorie affordable.

Anyhoo, that's all for now.

“The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight because by then, your body and your fat are really good friends” ~ Unknown Author

"Your body is the baggage you must carry through life. The more excess the baggage, the shorter the trip." ~ Arnold H. Glasgow

Hump Day, Biggest Loser and New Followers

2010-09-29T12:02:00.008-04:00

This is pretty much how my life is, When my ship sets sail, I will have either forgotten the day, or I'll be at the airport.

Whew!!! It is finally Wednesday. Everyone is always telling me I'm wishing my life away, just wishing for the weekend to get here sooner. Well I guess that's true, but the weeks just drag by and then my weekend flies by. I'm looking for a new prospective on life, so maybe when I find that I won't always be wishing my life away.

Speaking about new prospective, I have been listening to a Tony Robbins podcast (I guess you would say), I'm not really sure where it came from, but I started listening to it yesterday. Hence the reason I'm looking for a new prospective...It is called "Get the Edge". I just started listening yesterday, so I'm not that far into it, but with a great motivational speaker I'm sure it'll be great.

The Biggest Loser - I actually missed the first episode of the Biggest Loser, but it's on my On Demand, so when I get some time I'm going back to watch it (hopefully). But I did watch the second episode yesterday. I don't know why, but I get great motivation from seeing Jillian push someone to their limits. I know that I would give up the first week. When I'm working out, and I'm at the point where I think I can't go any further, I think what would Jillian scream at me at this point? Then I can go a little further.

But the weigh in's were awesome last night. How can one person lose 41 pounds in 2 weeks? Is that really possible? How much do they work out there? And if they are all cooking, eating and working out together, how can some lose that much and others only lose 12 pounds? I would love to win the lottery and be able to have a personal nutritionist, cook and personal trainer. But would that make it all better?

Tammy and I were discussing this just this morning, does the time that the contestants have on the ranch really give the time to mentally prepare for what is ahead? Does this "fast" weight loss give them enough time to wrap their mind around the mental aspect of the weight loss? The girl that was voted off last night (Allie) was 22 and had had gastric bypass surgery at the age of 14. First of all why would someone do that to their child? Is that really the only way that a child of 14 can lose weight? And it didn't work !!!!

Yeah!!! I have new Followers. I just noticed I am up to 26 now. Yeah me!!! Now I'm going to have to step up my game on this blogging thing. Sometimes I get lazy or busy and don't have enough time to blog, not enough time to read blogs, not enough time to comment on blogs. But I'm hoping to get better at this.

Last week I talked about inspiration. I read some great blogs and get a little inspiration from each one. But lately I've been going through a lot of things, some people say I have the worst luck of anyone they know, but sometimes things get in the way of our journey. I am going to do this, I am on this journey to get this done. It will probably take me longer than I anticipated, but I will get it done.

Quote for the day -

Try accepting the things in your life instead of focusing on wishes that might never happen. Life can be tough, but avoid wasting all you energy focusing on it because you still have a lot to live for.

You control you emotions.

Your thoughts and actions have to coexist with desires in order to function. Instead of being down about life, think about your goals and how you can accomplish them. Keep your thoughts positive, visualize the life you want every day and move towards your goal by working on your next plan of action.

Inspiration & the Biggest Loser

2010-09-24T08:34:00.006-04:00

Ok this pic has nothing to do with my post, but thought it was good.

I have been inspired. All the blogs I read are inspirational, but two or three imparticular (all are listed on my blog roll).

The first one is Sean at The Daily Diary of a Winning Loser. I started reading his blog last year and have found it very inspirational. It keeps me going sometimes when I think I cannot go any further. He has been at this for a long time and has lost a great deal of weight, and doing it the healthy way on his own. I have learned alot from his blog, and can't wait for the book (a definiate buy, even on my strict budget).

Secondly, is my friend Tammy at From Fat to Fab. She got me started blogging, and actually wanting to lose this weight. I kept telling her I wasn't ready to get started again, yet. We even worked out together for a while, but life and circumstances got in the way, and we have found different workout partners. I have found her blog very motivational, and inspiring also. She also trained my hubby to eat healthier when they were roommates, so he really doesn't mind eating the healthy stuff I cook.

And thirdly, is Pam from The Rest of The Journey. She has inspired me to do a half marathon and also to do the Biggest Loser Husband vs Wife Challenge. She has a lot of good ideas, and is very motivational. I have also stolen some of her recipes (From Apples to Zucchini) and the hubby loves most of them.

I also stole this badge from Pam (hope it's alright) !!!! I would make my own, but apparently I am not that smart.

I'm not sure if the hubby is totally on board with the Biggest Loser Husband vs Wife Challenge, but he told me he would do it if it makes me happy. He always wants to make me happy.

So we started our Challenge on Monday, but we are going to do our weigh ins on Friday. Our starting weights were:

Billie 198

Shane 220

For our first weigh in our results are:

Billie 196 ( -2)

Shane 219 ( -1)

That's just a smidge over 1% of percentage of body weight lost, so we aren't going to count that just yet.

We really didn't get off to a tremendous start, we have been watching what we eat and I am cooking healthier. We haven't gotten the exercise worked in yet, but we will be doing that next week.

There was a lot of stressful situations this week. I had a migraine for three days and only got six hours sleep in three days, which is a big reason I did not get in any exercise. That and the fact we haven't joined the gym yet. I know, I know we could walk around the neighborhood or go to the park, but it's just not really the same to me. It feels as if I'm not really working out.

I LOVE THE BIGGEST LOSER!!!! I was so excited about the premiere episode this week, and then I had a family emergency and missed it. It shows on the On Demand listing, but this episode has not shown up in the list yet. I'm hoping it's there tonight so I can watch it. I saw the first 20 minutes of it and then had to leave the house and didn't get back until 3am. I really hate to see people struggle so much, but it's inspirational and motivational to see that they can do it. I'm not one to push myself further than I think I can go. I'd be the one that just quits because my knee hurts or I'm out of breath. Just because it's too hard.

I did attempt a bike ride earlier in the week, mainly just goofing off with the kids, but boy am I out of shape. I only went about a 10th of a mile, if that. The first little bit was great, it was downhill. Then comes the hard part back up the hill the to the driveway. I got about two driveways up and had to stop and walk the rest of the way. I couldn't catch my breath and had to sit down. Now it could have been the fact that it was the 2nd day of the migraine, but probably not. Probably more likely that it was I'm just out of shape!!!

But anyhow, I'm back on track and we're going to do this !!!!! Yes we are !!!!

I am trying to put on a happy face and get through the stress that is bogging me down. Gotta get to working out, eating right and drinking my water. This challenge will help me to get ready for that half marathon I am bound and determined to do next year. I will do it!!!!

I found these quotes on Goals & Goal Setting, Words to live by

The virtue lies in the struggle not the prize. - Robert Monckton Milnes

It is not enough to take steps which may some day lead to a goal; each step must be itself a goal and a step likewise. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Who aims at excellence will be above mediocrity; who aims at mediocrity will be far short of it. - Burmese Saying

In absence of clearly defined goals, we become strangely loyal to performing daily acts of trivia - Author Unknown

God does answer prayer...and Weigh Day

2010-09-17T09:00:00.005-04:00

Well first I'll report on my weigh day, weighed in at 198 !!!! Back to One-derland, and planning on staying there. That is a 2lb loss this week. Good for me. It's been a rough week, I've tried to watch what I eat, but sometimes stress just gets to ya.

Yesterday, there were cupcakes lurking in the office from a birthday the day before. OK, Ok, I bought them for the birthday, that's my job as office manager, I take care of the details of the office. But I really thought I'd be able to resist them. I did have one on the birthday, but Tammy looked up the calories and I figured it into my budget for that day. Yesterday, they were still there. Tammy even asked if I wanted to split one with her, and I said no. We ordered lunch out yesterday, not a bad lunch I had a roasted chicken, spinach & artichoke wrap. Sounded good (and healthy) but they didn't have a calorie count online. However, as I was getting ready to leave the office I stopped to clean up the kitchen and those cupcakes were there calling my name...Lord help me, I just had to have one. I wasn't even hungry, the sweet tooth just got the better of me. Today, if all the cupcakes are not gone, they go in the trash.

Dinner was good, I had made Shepherd's Pie the night before, so we had leftovers.

Today's food has been ok. I had Oatmeal with 1/4C of skim milk; 2 non-fat, sugar free vanilla lattes (my weakness - much like Starbucks but I make my own); a Chicken Melt sandwich and cottage cheese; an apple and a handful of grapes. I not sure what I'm making for dinner yet, but it will be something with Chicken and veggies (squash, zucchini, peppers and onions - and I need to throw some mushrooms in there too).

I have still not been working out. I have been so busy and stressed with other things going on that I just haven't gotten there. We have not joined the new gym yet, hopefully this week, then there's no excuses.

Now to my answered prayers. To those who have read my blog you know that I have been in some financial difficulties because my ex sued me, and I was looking at having to pay his attorney fees of about $3500. Well last night after I got my paycheck transferred to the savings account and the rent money from my rental house transferred, I pulled out the order to see how much I was going to be short. For some reason I thought when I looked at the paper it was $3,511, but when I got it out last night it was $3,302. With all the money I had been putting into my savings account (no bills were paid this month), I had a total of $3,343. I DID IT!!!!! I have all the money needed to keep me from going to jail. I have been praying and stressing about this. I finally just gave it all to God and said this is what I have, if it's your will for me to go to jail so be it. God did not want me to go to jail apparently, and I have all the money together. We are going to the bank Saturday morning and get the certified check.

God is good if you just trust in Him and don't lose your faith. Now to put this weight thing in his hands. I can do it !!!! I just have to put forth a little more effort and it is possible.

2 Corinthian 12:9 says "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." How can I be so weak? How many times do I have to fall before I get it right? Questions like these have plagued me for years - many years. I was familiar with failure. In fact, I was so comfortable with it that accepting a gift like God's incredible favor and grace was difficult for me to comprehend, let alone embrace as truth in my life. I am learning how Christ could work powerfully through me because of my shortcomings He gave me something I hadn't had in a long time - hope.

Now I no longer have to pretend to be strong. I can admit my mistakes, mishaps and failures, and I have a God who loves and forgives me anyway.

Today is today and tomorrow is a new day, a new beginning, a fresh start.

Learning Perservance

2010-09-15T15:04:00.003-04:00

Hard rows to hoe are part of producing an abundant crop. Trying to lose weight and get more physically fit is hard work. It's a daily battle for me, or should I say a full-fledged war. But I am in this for life! My journey has been one of losing, gaining and beginning again. Even though I may lose a battle or two (and believe me I have) we will win this war!

Right now along with my war on weight loss, I am also having a parental war. I have always been the mother that no other mother wants to have around their kids, but the kids love me. I have never been super strict on my kids, I have tried to allow them to be their own persons. My ex always called me a liberal mother, which isn't entirely a bad thing, right? We have never had a lot of money, so my kids are by no means spoiled, but they do have their own opinions on things. I let my kids learn from their mistakes, not tell them what the outcome is going to be because I've already been there. Who knows the outcome may be different, you never know. But they always learn. And I think they have turned out pretty good. They are now 23 and 18. In my relationships I have never had a partner who had the same views on parenting as I do, so to say this caused riffs in my relationships is an understatement.

My son just turned 18 and finally got his license, but he has no car of his own. At this time I cannot afford to buy him a car, nor does he have a job so he can buy a car, so he is borrowing my car. Which is what I let his sister do, and I got her an inexpensive car when I could afford it.

Now the problem comes with my husband. He thinks my son should only be allowed to drive to and from to find a job, he should not be allowed to drive where ever he wants to. Now how many teenagers don't get to drive around and hang out with their friends??? He puts gas in the car, so what's the harm. He is a safe driver. My husband's argument is this puts wear and tear on the car. Well, yea but me driving everyday to work also does. I'm not really sure what the problem is here, but the solution, I am afraid, is not going to be a good one.

I am a Godly woman and I think that when you get married God makes you one, HOWEVER...if this is how it's going to be, a constant argument about my kids, I really don't need it. I have enough stress in my life the way it is. Why have a constant argument about my kids to add to it?

I have been trying to be positive lately. I have been going through alot of HELL, and I find that if I can find one positive thing to focus on, things are little more bearable. How am I going to find a positive in this? Sometimes trying to put up a good front becomes too much to bear.

Last night was one of those times when it became too much to bear. I had a really bad day at work, came home with the beginnings of a migraine. My son had texted me to ask if he could use my car again today. So in asking my husband if he could go in early to work, so I was not late again (the start of my bad day at work), he gave me an answer of "if I have to", or something to that effect. He says I took it wrong, but I think that's exactly what he meant. And then he proceeded to give me the wear and tear on the vehicle speech. The migraine is getting worse by the second, and I still have to cook dinner. Luckily I had a frozen bag meal that takes only 15 minutes to prepare. My husband and I are "discussing" the car issue as I cook dinner and my mother-in-law comes in to tell me of something my son did earlier in the day that she didn't agree with. I. of course, trying to keep the peace just said ok I'll talk to him, and appeared to just go on with what I was doing. But it was eating at me inside, I have no one on my side here. Everyone is against my son. So I get dinner on the table, and as I'm sitting there trying to eat a little of whatever it was I cooked for dinner, I just start crying. Trying not to show this emotion is harder that it appears while sitting at the dinner table. I eat a little, get the dishes cleaned up and go to my room for some migraine pills and a wet wash cloth to hide my tears. After a while of just laying there by myself I was beginning to feel better, if that is at all possible. Then the hubby comes in to discuss it...I must say there is no discussing my son with someone who does not have kids and either had no life during his teenage years or cannot remember them. So of course this lead to a bigger argument.

My whole mindframe is if something were to happen to me, who is going to take care of my son? My husband (and my mother-in-law) always say he will always have a home there, but really??? Will he feel this is his home when everyone is trying to stifle his life? I know he's 18 and an "adult", but is he really ready for life in the outside world, with no one to fall back on?

I know this is a heavy post for a weight loss blog, but...this kind of stress in my life leads to my food addiction. And last night if I had had a bottle of something or some money to go buy something, I would have so been drinking. It was just that kind of night. And I know that those kind of behaviors do not lead to good things, but it was just that kind of night.

All that said, I do feel somewhat better now. The sun is shining and I am alive, still a little bit of migraine, but all in all it's getting better. The food has not been overly bad today. I did have a cupcake for breakfast, only 220 calories, but I had skipped breakfast so not too bad.

2 lowfat, sugar free vanilla lattes
1 cupcake
3 pieces of chocolate candy
2 turkey hotdogs (45 calories each)
1/2 cup cottage cheese
1 banana

Haven't decided on dinner yet, but hopefully it will go better than last night.

So for now, a prayer

Lord, today I start fresh. I am ready to begin again. In my weaknesses You are strong. When I fall, You so graciously pick me up and set me on Your solid ground, again. Thank You for Your gift of grace. May I walk in Your strength and power today, one step at a time.

I forget what day I'm on already

2010-09-13T16:23:00.002-04:00

I had a pretty good weekend. Ended up volunteering at the farmers market on Saturday, and bought some fresh veggies. My husband and I like fresh veggies, and my friend Tammy told me a great way to cook them with olive oil cooking spray in the oven, therefore, no extra added oil.

So volunteering brings early mornings, we have to be there by 7:30 to set up, which leaves little time for breakfast. Made my low fat, sugar free vanilla latte at home to bring with me, and stopped by McDonalds to get the hubby an egg mcmuffin. I decided on just a plain bagel. After the farmers market we had to run errands with the in-laws, so we were at the mall at lunch time. Dad wanted a Gyro, he doesn't usually eat so we went to the Gyro place. I probably should have looked up to see how many calories I had eaten, but did not. I had a gyro wrap without the sauce, just the meat and lettuce. It was yummy, but like I said calories are unknown at this time. I was going to run by the store on the way home to get a few groceries but it was getting close to time for my son to be home, so I decided not to go. Mom said she had some lean ground beef laid out in the fridge that needed to be cooked that day, so I came up with something off the top of my head. I made a Salisbury steak type dish, with the ground beef, gravy and mushrooms. Made some fresh veggies with a potato cut up in it and some corn on the cobb. All in all it was a pretty good dinner, but again no calorie count.

SUNDAY was a whole different story. We had to be at church early. My husband and I are in charge of the coffee bar, so we make the coffee and set up all the things for coffee, so we have to be there early. So running a little late and once again no time for breakfast. Once I had drank my latte, I was starving. So we ran by Hardees to grab something. I used to work at Hardees in high school, and I love the cinnamon raisin biscuits. Needless to say these are not calorie friendly, but I got two of them anyhow. So I scarfed those down while getting the coffee ready. Then after church we all went out to the local pizza place. Since our church is new to this little town we try to go out to a local restaurant in the community every time we are in town. This place had the best smelling food, and I love Pizza. I could eat pizza three meals a day, although I know this is unhealthy, but has been done before. Anyhow, I opted for the house Calzone, this has lots of meats and cheeses, probably not calorie friendly either, and I ate the whole thing. I was miserable the rest of the day. All I wanted to do was go home and take a nap. Which I did not do. We went by the grocery store on the way home, and it was about 4:00 by the time we got home. So after getting the groceries put away and doing some things around the house, it was just too late for a nap.

Also, no exercise this weekend. I have got to start exercising.

Today, I found out that the gym we are going to join at my husband's work does not do payroll deductions for the gym membership which is what we thought they did, it all has to be paid in a lump sum. I know it's only $52, but when you're looking at having to pay $3500 to a stupid person by the 23rd, and you don't have it all some things have to be put on hold. And we will have to wait to see if I have all the money or if I'm going to jail. If I have all the money by the 23rd we will be joining when I get paid at the end of the month. If not I hear they have exercise facilities at the jail and three not so great meals a day. So I'll probably lose weight and exercise.

Quote for the day - Hope begins in the dark, the stubborn hope that if you just show up and try to do the right thing, the dawn will come. You wait and watch and work; you don't give up.

Day 3 & 4

2010-09-10T17:12:00.003-04:00

Yesterday was a very good food day, got all my water down, but still no exercise.

I was at 1495 in the calorie department. I made some scrumptious turkey sausage and veggies for dinner. The hubby loved the veggies. He didn't eat the sausage, because he's had some stomach issues the past two days.

Today the food has been okay. Not sure on my calorie count yet, haven't had dinner yet. Although I did go away from my normal lunch and had a wrap from Johnny's pizza. It was a grilled chicken, bacon, ranch wrap. It was tasty, but haven't looked up the calories yet. The bacon and ranch probably did me in.

I had my normal Oatmeal with 1/2c milk and splenda for breakfast.

Right now we are pretty broke, with having to pay the ex's attorney fees because he sued me, so it's kinda slim pickins on the veggie front. Veggies are so expensive because it's getting to the end of the season on most things. I'm going to go to the farmers market and see if I can get some good deals. We have been volunteering with our church at a local farmers market in Canton, but the produce is getting to the end of the season and getting smaller and smaller. We'll probably go back up there tomorrow and see what we can find.

But we are just doing what we can do for now. I think that as long as I eat in moderation I'm still going to lose. We are definitely not eating out as much (like almost never), so that helps also.

Hopefully this will be a relaxing weekend. Maybe some farmers market tomorrow and church on Sunday and just some rest. This has been the longest 4 day work week I have ever had.

I am hopeful to blog more over the weekend, but sometimes I don't even get on the computer. I do hope to start at the gym on Monday. Hoping, hoping, hoping. I need to get moving, I feel like the eating right is nothing without the exercise.

Well for now, good night.

Day 2 - New Me

2010-09-09T16:47:00.003-04:00

Day 2 didn't go too bad.

Last Wednesday my son turned 18. He had waited to get his drivers' license til he turned 18 because he didn't want to take the online drivers' education course I had gotten for him. He wanted to go to the drivers' education place and take the course and it was $500 and I wasn't paying that. So today I took him to get his drivers' license. He passed. He did really well for not really practicing, but of course he's had his learners permit for 4 years. We did the test in the morning, then I checked out a new gym at my husband's work, and then he brought me to work. It was the first day he has driven by himself...my baby. He said he was looking for a job, he did have one interview, then he had to pick up his girlfriend and then came back to pick me up. He and the girlfriend then went out and he was home by 10. I know that's an early curfew for an 18 year old, but I have to get up early for work so I told him to be home by 10. All actually went well.

It was also my father-in-law's birthday, so of course I had to have birthday cake and ice cream with him. He turned 65, you only do that once in life and he was so excited that Shane and I were there with him.

SO, before the cake and ice cream I was at 1475 for my calories for the day. I didn't even add the cake and ice cream because I know it would be way over my calorie budget for the day. But all in all it was a good day food wise.

I still have not got to the exercise portion on this new journey of mine. But I plan to start on Monday.

I was talking to Tammy (@ From Fat to Fab) about a half marathon she and a few other bloggers are going to be doing in November 2011 in Savannah. I am so going to do this. Not only will it be a vacation to Savannah, it will be a great goal to strive for. A half marathon...13 miles. That does seem like a long way when you are used to not doing anything. The farthest I have ever walked before (on the treadmill) was 4 miles. So I'm going to start on Monday to do work up to this. I was reading Pam's (@ the rest of the journey) blog from yesterday where she is talking about this half marathon, and I really like her 13 week plan. She is going to do interval walking training for the first six weeks to work up to the jogging/running for the half marathon. I think this is great. So starting Monday, I am going to start on the Plan. I will of course make my own modifications to the Plan, because I don't bike, I'll probably do elliptical and I will probably work out on different days. But I will definitely walk and do elliptical at least 5 days a week.

I am so excited that I have this goal to strive for. When there is a goal to strive for it is always easier to push yourself that extra mile.

For now I am headed home.

Day 1 of the New Me - Starting over

2010-09-08T14:54:00.002-04:00

WOW, I feel like I'm really going to do this. I still have some stressors in life, but I'm trying to give it all to God and let him work on it for a while.

Day one went really well, I did really well with my eating and my water. I didn't get in any exercise though. I have cancelled my gym membership because of a problem with the training contract and them continuing to take my money even after I cancelled. But that's another stressor all in itself.

We are looking at another gym, that my husband has access to through work. It is small but for only $52 a year for both of us, how can we pass it up. We were each paying $20 a month at the other gym, so for the both of us it was $40 a month vs $4.33 a month.

I did good with my food for the first day. I am allowing myself 1500 calories for now, and yesterday I logged 1451, so all in all it was good. I need to add more fruit and veggies and cut out the lattes'. Although I have developed my own latte, which is only 93 calories each. I use skim milk, sugar free french vanilla creamer and coffee and I envision it tastes just like Starbucks. It really a mind over matter thing.

So all in all my first day back was pretty good.

Every time you face a challenger, you are being tested as to how strong your beliefs and intentions are. People who go through great hardships achieve greatness. Confront your challenges with a brave face. The greater the challenge, the greater the gift of power. - A.C. Ping

Been Absent - But now I'm back

2010-09-04T17:48:00.006-04:00

It's been a while, and a lot of things have happened. Some good, some bad, but a lot has gone on in the past 4 months.

Let's see - MAY ---STRESS --- I was served papers by my ex. He was suing me for contempt of court, because I could not keep up on the mortgage that was in both our names and I was contemplating bankruptcy. SO... talk about emotional eating, I had no clue how to get out of this one. The bankruptcy attorney told me I had to be three months past due on all the bills I

would include and so I was, now how was I to come up with three months of mortgage payments. I also had to get an attorney, how would I come up with this. EMOTIONAL EATING to say the least. And to top it all off, Shane's dad was back in the hospital and not doing well at all. He refuses to eat or drink. He has a lot of health issues, and he's not that old - only 64.

JUNE - Shane's dad still in hospital, getting worse. They really weren't sure if he would live. The only thing that was really keeping him going was the fact that he was going to be the best man in our wedding in October. He was only living for that. The doctor's had called us in and told us that they weren't sure he would make it, they called in cardiologists, gastro-interologists all kinds of doctors, but they couldn't find out exactly what was wrong with him. He was extremely malnourished, so they were going to put in a feeding tube. Shane and I decided that we were going to go ahead and get married at the hospital with just my kids, his mom and a select few friends. That way if his dad died, we could say that we had carried out his dying wish. It was very hard to make this decision. I had always wanted to have a nice wedding. I've been married twice before, and the first one was very small and the second one was at the justice of the peace. I had already purchased my dress and we were making plans. So to just have this small wedding was not at all what I planned. But I have to think of others also, so we made the decision to do it.

We are planning on renewing our vows in our church with our minister on our first anniversary. I will wear my wedding gown that I had already purchased and we will take a real honeymoon. So June 13, 2011 I must fit into my wedding dress. Hopefully it will have to be altered smaller.

Of course the day of the wedding, mother nature paid a visit, so the wedding night was not what I planned either.

One week later, while helping Shane move the rest of his stuff in. I was running from Shane, and my son accidentally tripped me, causing me to fall full force on my right knee. Fractured patella. Not fun, had to wear a leg brace for five weeks, no exercise, no driving (right knee-hard to drive with my leg straight).

Four days later, I had to be in court to answer the charges of contempt. I thought it was going to go in my favor for a few minutes, but alas the devil won again. He always seems to come out on top, no matter what the circumstance. So not only was I charged with contempt, I have to place the house on the market and keep all the payments current. AND I had 90 days to pay his attorney's fees. Great, now how was I to come up with $2995 (the figure they quoted in court)? I am by no means rich, I have a decent job, but the majority of my paycheck goes to paying back a loan that comes directly out of my check. So I live pay check to pay check. With Shane's added income, it would make the bills easier to pay, but not an additional $3000 in 90 days. SO...MORE STRESS AND EMOTIONAL EATING. There were some days I didn't know if I would make it through. I was very depressed and actually thought that if something dreadful happened to me, everyone would be better for it. I felt alone in many situations. My family was once very close, but now everyone lives somewhere else, so I have no emotional support from my family. They have their own lives, and I feel abandoned by them.

At a point in my life (before I had this loan to pay back) I was making pretty good money and I helped out my mom and my sister quite a great deal. But now my sister and her husband are doing pretty well for themselves and they have forgotten where they came from and what I had done for them. My mom moved to Las Vegas three years ago, to be closer to my sister because she thought I no longer had time for her because I was busy with work and my then-husband who had emotional needs that were more than I had ever imagined. She now lives in Wyoming with my sister. My older sister lives in Saudi Arabia and she does not talk to me. So this is why I feel abandoned.

My mother-in-law and my boss both suggested I get some kind of help for this depression I was in. But I just turned to food, it was the best medicine for me. After all it had been my friend for over 25 years.

JULY - I turned 44. This was a major emotional time for me. I looked at it as I was 44 years old and I had nothing. I didn't know what I was going to do with my life. I was still very depressed, and still eating emotionally. I couldn't figure out what to do to stop.

At some point, I did talk to a good friend of mine at church, and as I talked about all that was going on, I'm listening to myself and I'm like, what are you so depressed for, life will get better it can't always be like this. I have my kids, I have my husband, I have a few close friends, and I have my dogs. I have God and my church.

During this time, we were in the process of opening a new church campus. I poured myself into this, trying to find out why God was punishing me. What had I done so wrong in my life that I was being punished so severely. During July our Core Team for the new campus were meeting weekly at one of the team member's houses. It was such a bonding time for us. Just us and God.

AUGUST - The church did a Daniel Fast for 10 days before the new campus' Grand Opening. This really helped me immensely as there is a daily devotional that goes along with it. And as I prayed every day and fasted the light came on. I needed to get back to the task at hand, and get back on track with everything in my life. It wasn't going to get better on it's own, if I didn't take the bull by the horns, I was going to keep in going in this downward spiral, and it wasn't looking pretty. I could either keep on this path of destruction or I could make it better.

I finally got the house listed this month, so that's one monkey off my back. I still have to keep the payments up, while paying my present rent and bills, but I am getting some of the money back in rent from a tenant I have there. I was able to get a copy of the court Order, even though my attorney kept telling me one had not been signed. I finally went to the courthouse and just asked them, and low and behold there it was signed on July 16, and my attorney had told me that it was not signed yet on July 23. I think my attorney didn't know what the heck she was doing. Not only did I not feel I was represented adequately, but she refuses to return any of my phone calls since we were in court. She emails me responses to my phone calls (after I have called her at least 4 times). However, the court order says that I have to pay almost $3500 not the original $3000 that I was anticipating. And this has to be paid by September 23. I don't know how I am going to come up with this additional money, but somehow God willing I will have it, or I will go to jail. Now more added STRESS and Emotional Eating.

During the past 4 months I had gained back 15 pounds. During the fast I lost 5 of them.

SEPTEMBER - my baby boy turned 18 on September 1. This has been a constant battle also, as he has a girlfriend. They want her to move in with us (not happening), but she's here every weekend under the pretense that she is going to church with us. They then give me a hard time about getting up to go to church, so it's a constant battle. She is very disrespectful to her parents, which I will not put up with, and if my son thinks he is going to talk to me like she talks to her parents, I have already told him, he will be finding another place to live. Children think that when they turn 18 they are adults, and they can make all their own decisions. What makes them adults??? They have no jobs, no cars and no money. They depend on me to support them. I can no longer handle this, I will no longer take this.

Starting Tuesday (because Monday is a holiday and we already have plans for a cookout with the in-laws) I will be back on track. I AM TAKING BACK MY LIFE !!!!!

I have got to get this done. My feet and back kill me when I'm walking around all day. I am constantly tired and just plain worn out. When I'm not at work, I feel like I just want to sleep all the time.

SO IT'S MY TIME...I AM GOING TO DO THIS NOW...I AM TAKING MY LIFE BACK!!!!

Summer Challenge

2010-05-24T20:48:00.005-04:00

I have joined my daughter, Kandice's, summer challenge.

So now, I can't remember all the rules but I do remember I am supposed to post a pic of my scale for my starting weight as of this morning,

Yes that is right, 189.5. I am still under 190 so I'm doing pretty good. I'm under a lot of stress right now, but I've got to do this. My goal is to lose 10 pounds a month or 30 pounds for the challenge.

I have a special reason for wanting to do this, and an added incentive. My wedding...yes we have set the date 10-10-10. I went with Kandice and Tammy last week and picked out the dress. I love it, and since my fiancee' does not read my blog I am posting a pic of it.

Yeah Me !!!! Fittin into smaller sizes

2010-05-17T12:13:00.003-04:00

Very, very excited right now. I went to try on wedding dresses yesterday. I go into the bridal shop and the girl asks me what size I wear. I've been wearing 18's. some 16's. So I tell her 18 cuz I know they are usually smaller and I don't want to be miserable. She tells me how the dresses are made smaller and I will probably want to go up a size, maybe two. SO we're looking at 20's and 22's. I pick out the ones that I like, and go to try it on. A 22 just swallows me whole, tons of wiggle room, practically fell off me. So the girl looks at it and goes to get me a smaller size. She brings it back I look at the size and it's a 16. I'm thinking there is no way. So I am extra careful when squeezing my hips into it hoping I won't break the zipper and have to buy it anyway. But to my surprise I was able to pull it right up. I walk outside the dressing room and my daughter is helping me zip it up and I'm sucking in...and it's not fitting. I didn't really expect it to. The girl comes back with a veil, and she looks at the dress and she says I'm gonna fix this, and zips it right up. IT FIT!!!! A SIZE 16 FIT!!!!! After she got it zipped and everything it really wasn't uncomfortable, I didn't feel like I was holding my breath or like the zipper would break if I did take a deep breath. SO EXCITED!!!! IT FIT!!!

Since my fiancee' does not read my blog I'm gonna post the pic, so everyone can see.

Valentines Day 2010

2010-02-14T20:05:00.003-05:00

Valentines Day is a special day to spend with the ones you love. And guess what??? The boyfriend popped the question. I was so surprised. I knew he was planning something, but I had no idea what magnitude it would be.

We went out to dinner, very nice seafood restaurant, and we ordered the valentines day special. Filet Minon and Lobster tail, and I ate every bit of it. It was delicious. This was a special day and I didn't even watch the calories. We did however go for lunch to miss the crowds, and I did work out this morning, and then just had a snack later.

The proposal was very romantic. We had dinner and the manager comes over and asks if we wanted dessert, well of course I want dessert. They had the best looking desserts. I ordered the key lime pie and we shared it. The manager, not our server, brings it to me. And on the plate with my dessert is a ring!!! OMG...it was beautiful and I started crying. As they set the plate down, and I'm crying, he gets down on one knee beside the table and asks me to marry him. OH MY, I am really crying now, so sweet. Of course I said YES. Then there were lots of congratulations because everyone in the restaurant is watching and the manager brings us champagne to celebrate. It is a beautiful pink diamond with a diamond band. It has been handed down from his grandmother, so that makes it even more special. There was evidently a lot of planning that went into this proposal that I had no clue about. Everyone knew about it but me. Thanks Tammy you could have given me a mascara alert!!!!

So this post has nothing to do with my weight loss, but everything to do with bad eating, but today...for just one day, I don't care. I will get back to it tomorrow.

Week 21 Weigh Day & Mindless eating

2010-02-13T10:40:00.002-05:00

Friday morning weigh in, oh how I so look forward to stepping on that scale. Well I was down exactly 1 pound today, which I am fairly happy with.

For the most part I have eaten pretty good this week, but in analyzing my week, I don't think I have had enough water. I have been very busy at work this week with training for new job tasks and conversion of my previous work load to another office. I have a 64 oz water bottle and I try to drink two a day, which most days I do at least 1 and a half, then I have two 16 oz bottles of water during after workout and with dinner. Which all in all if I did it every day would be GREAT. However, when I'm busy, on conference calls, online training, etc I sometimes forget to drink my water. Then as I'm leaving work there is my empty bottle and I think to myself I never did back to the water cooler to fill that up. And after that it is impossible to make it up. After my workout I drink a bottle of water with dinner then have nothing else the rest of the evening. I should probably have another 32 oz or so before bedtime, but find it hard to do this. Also when I'm at home I find it hard to get all my water in. At work it's right there, but at home I'm busy doing everything that I can't get done during the week and I forget to drink my water. Like right now, it's 10:30am and I have had no water. At work I have generally already had at least a half a bottle.

Better go get some water!!!!

Now the mindless eating, Thursday (day before weigh in) I was on a training conference call for 2 1/2 hours. I had planned on going to Publix to get a wrap for lunch. However, with the conference call lasting through my morning snack and into lunch that was out the window. The secretary came in the with the local pizza place delivery menu and waved it at me. I was starved and of course said yes. But I did get good toppings (kinda) artichoke hearts and procuitto ham. However, still on the conference call when pizza gets there I am mindlessly eating this lovely, flavorful pizza and look down and have I eaten half the pizza. What is wrong with me??? I have a session with my personal trainer tonight, I'm not going to be able to move. Well as it turns out he worked us out HARD that night and I was able to move, but felt sluggish. And the day before weigh in. So that is why I am happy with a 1 pound loss.

So here's to a better week next week.

Week 20 - Weigh Day

2010-02-06T07:32:00.003-05:00

WooHoo, I'm on the right track now.

I am down to 194.4 this week, a 2.2 loss. I think this trainer is going to work. We have been working out on our own, doing the weight machines they told us to do at the other gym, but I really just haven't been feeling it. Now I'm feeling it. We don't work out on that many machines, and our trainer, Chris, is showing us how to do the weights and things so we can do it without him. Starting next week we will only be seeing him once a week, but we should still be doing strength training at least two other days. So know what we should and exactly how to do it is the key. I have been doing extra cardio also. Chris says extra cardio is just a bonus. I like bonuses. On Thursday we worked out with Chris, I got to the gym early (I'm usually late) and went on in did the massage chair (a perk of membership) and started on my cardio warmup. I did 30 minutes before our session, did our 30 minute session and then another 20 minutes. Boy are my glutes and hamstrings hurting. Friday night Tammy doesn't go to the gym, so I met my boyfriend there and I did 35 minutes of elliptical. I needed to do some abs, but didn't because I was tired and it has been a long week.

Next week I plan on getting up early every day and going to the gym on my way to work and do at least 30 minutes of cardio. Then back to the gym after work for more cardio, abs and workout. I am going to accomplish my goals this time. I AM GOING TO DO THIS.

On another note have I said how much I hate traffic. In Atlanta if it rains people suddenly become driving idiots. AND we have had our fair share, and everyone elses share, of RAIN. I am beginning to hate rain. BRING ON THE SUNSHINE!!!!!!!!!!!! This past week it has been a bear every single day getting to work and back home in the freaking traffic. I work 32.8 miles from my house, a typical 35 minute drive. Monday 1.25 hours to work, an hour home. Tuesday 2 hours to work, 2.25 hours home. Tuesday I had a training session at 6:30, left work at 5 got there at 7:15. Needless to say I missed my session and we rescheduled for Wednesday. Wednesday was an okay day, traffic wise. 1 hour to work and 1hour home. Since I had the training session rescheduled for Wednesday I left work at 4:45 to make sure I got there on time this time. Thursday 1.5 hours to work and again I left early to make my training session, so it only took me an hour. FRIDAY - 3 HOURS TO WORK, 2 HOURS HOME!!!!! Yeah in case you can't tell I hate traffic. I have proposed moving our office half way between my house and where it is now, it seem like all the accidents happen after this point. Sounded like a good plan to me. Maybe if we did that I could get home, which would be a 15 minute drive from there, in only 45 minutes. And they say Atlanta is only like #22 with the worst traffic. Yeah don't think I want to move anywhere else that has traffic.

I am so ready for Sp...Summer. I started to say Spring, but it rains a lot in Spring too. I really like the weather of Spring, but hate the rain. I don't really like the extremely hot temperatures of summer, it gets to about 98 with 95% humidity around here. But I don't like the cold either. We had our week of winter weather, now it can go away. I know it's much worse other places, but that's why I live in the South, not really bad winters. It is 42 degrees right now, so it's really not that cold, but I like 60 better. I think 70 degrees year round with rain once a month would be a great climate to live in.

Enough ranting about the weather and TRAAFFICC!!! I just thank God everyday that I am alive and getting healthier. I want to lead a healthy life for ME and for God. Sometimes it's hard, sometimes it's almost unbearable, but in all times give praise to God and it will turn out alright.

Time to go work out again, so more later.

Weigh In and Measurements

2010-01-31T11:38:00.004-05:00

Ok official weigh in is 196.6, so I'm moving a little, I'm down .4 from last weigh in.

Tammy and I started working out with a trainer on Saturday. He took all our measurements (listed in side bar) and our body fat. My body fat was 41.7 which is less than it was in October when I had my last assessment. It was 42.55 then. I must say I have lost several inches, so I guess I'm doing something right.

I sure hope this training works. I'm really going to work on this, because if I'm paying him to help me do this I have got to make it work. He says he will help us reach our goals. The work out he put us through yesterday kicked my butt. I did find out I am definitely too fat to have good balance. We were doing some kinda ab thingy with the large ball, and I couldn't balance the ball enough to do even one. Every time I got into the position and went to pull the ball in I lost my balance and my feet rolled off the ball. It was so bad.

Our trainer is supposed to give us a detailed work out plan that we are supposed to do when we are not working out with him. Since we are only actually seeing him once a week, I don't know that we will push ourselves and each other as hard as the trainer does. But we will see.

I am also going to start doing more cardio. I'm going to stop at the gym on my way to work every morning and do at least 20 minutes, hopefully 30 minutes. I am also going to start tracking my food better. I did great on my food yesterday.

Breakfast Oatmeal w/1/4 c milk

Snack(after workout) 1c Cottage cheese, 1c apple & grapes

Lunch Chicken burrito w/ no tortilla (chicken, 1/2c rice, 1/4c black beans, 1tbsp sour cream, 1/4c shredded cheese)

Snack Protein shake w/1c milk & 1 banana

Dinner Salmon, asparagus & green beans

The trainer says we should have a protein, a carb and a fat for every meal.

Forgot to give back the award

2010-01-20T16:17:00.003-05:00

I forgot to give back the award to 7 deserving people so here goes

Midlife Swimmer

Tina @ Fat Girl Dives In

Leslie @ Something Brilliant is Brewing

Lisa @ In Weigh Over My Head

Tammy @ From Fat to Fab (even though you already got one - you are my inspiration)

Dawne @ 365 Days to a new me

Jenn @ Watch my butt shrink

You guys really inspire me to keep going. You are all great!!!!!!!!!!!!

Getting close to 4 months & An Award

2010-01-20T14:51:00.002-05:00

Thank you to Kelsey @ The Sweet Tooth Obliteration Operation for this lovely award she bestowed upon me. I was very excited to get a blogger award, as sometimes my blog gets left behind with my busy schedule.

Now 7 things most people don't know about me....

1. I hate winter. I wouldn't live anywhere in the north because of the extreme cold. I love to see snow, I think it's beautiful, just wouldn't want to live in it.

2. I have lived in Georgia all of my life, with the exception of 1 year. I lived in Tennessee that year and it was winter (and refer to #1).

3. I love the beach. the feel of sand between my toes and the sun on my face.

4. I am a Christian. I love God above all and thank him everyday for all of my blessings he has given. I go to church on Saturday, but am not Seventh Day Adventist.

5. I love beautiful sunrises (especially when I'm at the beach). And thank God for each one.

6. I cannot swim. Never have and probably never will. But I love the water.

7. I don't have a lot of close friends, but many acquaintances.

Now on to other things. Tomorrow will be 4 months that I have been on this journey. I guess 25 pounds in four months isn't too bad, but I would like it to be better. I am hitting the gym hard and watching exactly what I eat from now on. I want to be down at least 25 more pounds by April. I have a big convention coming up, that everyone in our industry goes to, and I only see most of these people once a year. I just think it would be great to be down 50 pounds by the time I see all these people again. I will also update my measurements tomorrow, hopefully it will be good.

Yesterday was a great day food wise and exercise wise. I did the elliptical for 25 minutes on my way to work, then met my daughter at her gym and did the elliptical for 30 minutes after work. The last minute I did it at 9-10. Awesome rush, but talk about out of breath.

Food wise I was spot on at 1700 calories. A little high on the fat and sodium side, but other than that I did great.

NUTRIENT GOAL 1/19/10

Calories 1600-17000 1700

Fat 32-56 64

Carbs 163-236 181

Protein 60-127 102

Sodium 500-2300 2599

So all in all a good day.

Today was probably not as good a day, but I'll figure that out after dinner. No work out today either. I overslept this morning, and was on a project at lunch time so I couldn't leave the office, so no work out. Tonight I have to work late, still on the project (which I really better get back to) so I won't be working out tonight. I guess I need one day off this week. Back at it in the morning though.

So for now...When you judge another, you do not define that person, you define YOURSELF. So the moral to that is, don't judge others, we're all in this together.

Update tonight

2010-01-18T20:38:00.003-05:00

I did 45 minutes on the elliptical tonight on my way home, I did not do the strength training though. I did good on my calories and food today, stayed within my limits on everything. Good start to my new me. I'm going to try to get up early enough in the morning to do some cardio on my way to work in the morning.

NUTRIENTS: GOAL TODAY Calories: 1,600-1,700 1,638 Fat: 32 - 56 51 Carbs: 163 - 236 163 Protein: 60 - 127 93 Sodium, Na: 500 - 2,300 1,939

New Year, New Goals

2010-01-18T15:39:00.002-05:00

It has been a while since I blogged, wow...almost 6 weeks. I've been keeping at it, just not a diligently. In December I was so busy with work and getting all the year end things done there. Our company was bought out and the new owners took over January 1, so there was that added pressure. All the books had close by the end of the month so everything would go smoothly. Also, there were no guaranteed jobs with the new owners, so I wasn't sure that I was even going to have a job. It seemed very fruitless some times, to be working my a** off, and then not have a job...but I was very faithful and just left it to God and new owners, and I have a job. Yeah me. However, my job will be reviewed in 90 days and it will be determined at that time if I keep my job. So I thank God every day for what I have, and if it is His will, I will still have a job in 90 days. I have had this job for 21 years, so I really, really don't want to go out and look for another job, and I don't even know that I know how to look for a job anymore. But hopefully every thing will work out and I'll be here another 20 years.

So on to my weight loss. As I said I haven't been as diligent lately, but I haven't really gone backwards either. I have lost some and maintained. NOW on to the losing again. I am now down to 197, so yeah me....I'm in Onederland, and will not leave here ever again. I've started counting my calories again and working out hard. I'm trying to stay between 1500-1700 calories. I'm doing cardio either on my way to work or at lunch for 30 minutes, then I usually meet Tammy at the gym after work and do cardio for 30 minutes and then do strength training. I'm loving the low impact of the elliptical because of my plantar fasciitis. We started doing some new weight exercises for the bat wings, which I can really feel the next day. After Saturday's work out I had pain in my arms and my abs, and I didn't do any more than normal on the crunches, so I feel it had to be from the pull down exercises we are doing. Sunday I had to skip the workout, as my internet had been out for 4 days and Sunday morning was the only time they could come out and fix it (I didn't even know they worked on Sundays), then the kids had to go to the mall and that was all she wrote. However, the mall was quite a work out all in itself.

So today is a new day. I have consumed 1,052 calories and have had 2 33oz bottles of water. I did my 30 minutes of elliptical (2miles) this afternoon at lunch. Since Tammy can't workout tonight I will stop on my way home and do the elliptical again, and maybe some strength training. I'm just not as dedicated to it if I'm by myself.

I will not be eating out this week. I have found some low cal recipes that are really not that hard to make, and my daughter will be making dinner. As she is not working right now and only goes to school two nights a week she has a little free time, and I just know she loves it.

Anyhow, I'm going to get caught up on all my reading of the blogs shortly and will be trying to post more regularly now that I have a little more free time.

So for now, count all your blessings God has given you.

Week 10 - Weigh Day

2009-12-04T14:01:00.005-05:00

Last week I only had 3.6 pounds to go til One-derland.....Did I make it???? Only the scale will tell. Weighed in this morning and ..........201.4.....NO did not make it, almost but not quite, still have 1.6 pounds to go. I did eat out too much last week, went to Starbucks too much and I haven't worked out in 3 days. So it's really not a surprise that I didn't lose as much as I had hoped.

Lets see my week in review...
Friday I was off work so worked out early, went to Starbucks, went to lunch at Moe's, did some Christmas shopping and Starbucks again, then went out to dinner at Cracker Barrell
Saturday worked out early, Christmas tree shopping, went to lunch at Williamson Bros BBQ, then church (and they have a coffee bar better than Starbucks), then I made turkey pot pie with left over Thanksgiving turkey.
Sunday had lunch with Shane's family at Craker Barrell, worked out in afternoon and then went to Starbucks. We ate dinner at home - lemon pepper chicken and scalloped potatoes.
Monday, back to work hectic day, worked out after work, had Subway on the way home
Tuesday, No workout, helped Shane's mom put up her Christmas tree and we ordered pizza (and not very healthy pizza - deep dish with everything on it).
Wednesday, had lunch out and Starbucks, No workout, had to go grocery shopping and went to Chili's for dinner.
Thursday, Lunch from Jason's Deli (healthy), No workout, had a migraine, had homemade Turkey Chili for dinner.

And of course there was no calorie counting this week.

So all in all it was a mixed week. Not very good eating, so-so workouts, but lost 2 pounds.

GOAL for next week - One-derland here I come.

1. I will workout every day. My plan is going to be to do at least 2 miles in the morning or at lunch (or both if I can) and then workout at the gym with Tammy (cardio and strength training)

2. Eat at home. I will not eat out as much this week. I will control my food, not let my food control me.

3. Track my calories.

4. I will not go to Starbucks more than once this week.

So far today has gone good.

Breakfast - Oatmeal 140, 1/2 cup 2% milk 61, splenda and blueberries 41, and 8oz Apple Juice 117 .
Snack - Apple 74
Lunch - BBQ Chicken Quesadilla (Lean Cuisine) 260, 1/2 c Cottage Cheese 80
Snack - 2 Cheese Sticks 120

892 calories used, which leaves me 700-800 for dinner and snack later

I walked 2 miles on treadmill this afternoon, and will do more cardio and strength training tonight at gym.

Thanksgiving Over & Weigh Day

2009-11-27T08:07:00.002-05:00

Friday is my official weigh day, and being the day after Thanksgiving I wasn't sure about it. I did weigh yesterday before I started cooking and eating and I was exactly the same as last week. So I figured it couldn't be that bad. This morning I weighed and what did I see.....203.4....woohoo...down .6, I'll take it.

Thanksgiving was a great day, with great friends and family. My first Thanksgiving I actually made. It turned out good. I took pics but left the camera at Tammy's house so she could download her so cute new pics. I'll post pics later. Everything turned out great, too much of course, but it was good. I think the turkey was a little dry, but everyone said it was good, I think they we just being nice and trying not to hurt my feelings. But for the first one, it wasn't too bad. Lots of yummy food, and only one dessert. Shane's dad made a pie, million dollar pie, it had fruit & cool whip and marshmallows, just one sliver for me. I didn't count calories, but only had a spoonful of each thing and two slices of turkey.

For breakfast I had my oatmeal and 12 grain toast. We then had Thanksgiving lunch. I wasn't stuffed, but satisfied. I then went over to Shane's parents house to visit, this is only down the street from the 24 hour gym I joined earlier (and I still have membership til mid December), so I decided on my way home I was going to do 2miles on the treadmill. Then when I got home I only had a small helping of corn casserole and a slice of cranberry sauce. I still wasn't very hungry but decided I should eat something. SO, a not so bad eating day, and I lost .6 pounds.

I'm headed out now to meet Tammy and workout. More later.

2 Months - Battle of the Bulge

2009-11-22T21:17:00.003-05:00

It has been 2 months since I started this journey to a healthier lifestyle. I am down 18 pounds and 14.75 inches overall (I will put stats in my sidebar). Yea Me. I am very motivated right now to continue this journey, but the holidays are coming up and there is always a lot of eating to do around the holidays. I think with the Christmas Challenge that I will be more motivated to stay on track. So Holidays here I come.

Interestingly, I have been talking about starting to count my calories again. When I first began this my children thought I was obsessed with calorie counting, and then I just kinda got away from it. I need to get back to that obsession, and start counting. I am doing alot of cardio and there's not a lot of results on the scale. I mean a pound a week, and it should be 3. So I'm going with the advice of the trainer at the gym, she said I needed between 1,600 and 1,900, so I'm going with 1,500. Okay, so not exactly the advice she gave, but close. I've been doing around 1,300, so I'm going to up it to 1,500 and see what results I get from that.

I am elated about the inches lost though. I have been feeling that my clothes are getting looser. My sweats are getting so baggy that the crotch hangs to my knees, and as I'm walking and sweating, I am getting chaffed on my legs. Soon there will be nothing there to chaff, but for now there is. So this week I'm looking for a smaller size sweats to work out in.

This weekend Shane and I volunteered at the community Thanksgiving for the needy in our city. I was so blessed by this, and know that I have so much to be thankful for. God is so good to us, and I was so happy to share in this experience. I makes me more thankful for the Thanksgiving dinner I will be preparing this next week. Everyone should pray for me though, I have never cooked Thanksgiving dinner before. I have always gone somewhere for Thanksgiving dinner where someone else cooked.

And for those of you that read my blog and Tammy's blog, she will not be home alone on Thanksgiving, because we have moved our Thanksgiving dinner to her house so she will be included with our family. She is such a great person, we love her and don't want her to be alone at the holiday. I am also thankful for Tammy, because without her I am sure I would not have decided to go on this journey again. She is a great inspiration.

Day 60 - Battle if the Bulge

2009-11-20T14:06:00.003-05:00

WEIGH DAY AND SMART WATER

Today is weigh day. So the scale says 204, down only 1 pound. I guess it's better than up 1 pound, but still not what I had hoped for. I've been working out twice a day, almost every day. Most mornings I do a mile on the treadmill and then I do 2 - 2.5 miles at night 6 days a week, I do strength training 5 days a week. Every other night I do the C25K, but I can only muster up enough energy to do 4 of the 8 runs. I'm working up to this though.

This morning I did the C25K, and could only do 4 of the 8 runs...I can't catch my breath in the minute and half it gives you to walk, but I'm going to try to do 6 of the runs next time. This is 1.5 miles. I then went at lunch time to the gym near my office, and walked another mile. So I'm down 2.5 miles today. I plan to go to the gym tonight and try the C25K again.

As I was doing my run this morning I suddenly had pain in two toes on my right foot. It felt like I was being stuck with a needle. I finished my walk/run and took my shoe and sock off, only find there was nothing in my shoe. I had worn blisters on my two toes. I have heard about this, in fact I think Tammy has had blisters for the last month or two, but to actually have them. It's hard to walk. So after my walk this afternoon, I immediately went to CVS and picked up some blister strips, they are feeling much better now. I will not let this keep me from goal.

I'm still not counting my calories, and I think this may be my problem. I'm not really overeating, and I'm watching what I eat, but maybe I'm taking in too many calories.

Yesterday I also bought a bottle of SmartWater. It looked smart, but was just about as smart as the water I get out of the water cooler at work. It didn't seem to make me any smarter, but the bottle was colorful. I actually bought this bottle of SmartWater because it was 34 ounces. If I fill it up twice I'm drinking 68 ounces. Yesterday I filled it up 4 times. So I think I'm doing good on my water.

2009-11-17T20:49:00.002-05:00

Can't wait for Thanksgiving to be over with. Tammy and I have been working out hard, but I feel like it will all be blown as soon as Thanksgiving gets here. I have a plan, but will I stick to that plan. In looking at my menu I'm having lots of carbs, turkey and a green vegetable. I'm not a big sweet eater so dessert won't be a problem, but I love Thanksgiving dinner, and then I have clean up where I usually eat as much as I would eat as I do at dinner.

Addictions...they say that when you give up one addiction another one takes over. Tammy and I were talking the other day about how addicting the gym is getting to be, and it is. I can't wait to get off work to go work out. We usually work out 6 days a week, doing cardio every night and weights 5 nights. I usually walk a mile at the gym in the morning, and I've been trying to figure out how to work in a mile at lunch time. It only takes 17 minutes for a mile, so I could do that at lunch. The gym is about 10 minutes away from my office, so 37 minutes and I still have time to eat. It could happen.

I worked at home today and actually thought about going back to bed for an hour before I got started on my work, and skip my workout. But I was so siked when I got up and stepped on the scale and it showed 2lbs down. Now today is not my weigh day, but kinda just peeked today. SO I had to get dressed and go work out. I just couldn't let it go today, and not try to have a loss this week. I figure the more cardio I do, the more fat I lose. So I JUST DID IT!!!! Walked 1.5 miles this morning, because I wasn't hurrying to get to work.

Watching the Biggest Loser tonight I found out that there is always a reason why we are fat, and you have to find out why or it won't work, you will go back to the same behavior if you don't come to grips with the reasons. I was thinking about this and I have some serious soul searching to do to figure out how I got to the point where I started putting on this weight. I really think it was a series of things, where everything kept happening. I have always been an emotional eater. Since I started my journey 8 weeks ago, I have been trying to change that behavior. I need my own personal Jillian to help with with this journey, she just gets inside your head and even though she appears to be a b*tch, it is a motivation to keep going.

I have been doing good with my food although I haven't been actually counting calories, and I feel that even though I'm eating what I should eat, I can see my old eating patterns coming back. I need to get back into counting the calories, not just figuring in my head. Because as I get older my head's just not what it used to be, and I have so many numbers running around in there, I could actually be eating too many calories.

Anyhow, I can tell in my clothes that I am losing inches, and I think this weekend I will take my measurements again to see where I am.

Quote for the day - What possibilities would exist for you if you could eliminate the worry from your day?

Battle of the Bulge - Week 8 - Weigh Day

2009-11-13T12:53:00.002-05:00

Weigh Day today, the scale says 205.0, so that's a 1.5 loss. When I was at the gym Wednesday morning, they have a scale in the bathroom so, I weighed and I was at 203.2 which would have been 3.2 loss, but alas Mother Nature has reared her ugly head, and that's what happened to 3.2. But 1.5 is still a loss and I'll take it, any loss is a good loss.

My eating has been okay, although I have not actually counted calories. I have just kinda been figuring in my head...ok the oatmeal has 140, a piece of toast is 70, milk is....you get the picture. But I think I may forget something, and still go over on my calories. So I am going back to calorie counting tomorrow.

I wasn't feeling very well the first of the week, I thought I was coming down with a cold. So I started taking Tylenol Cold during the day and Nyquil at night, so this could have also added to my not so great weight loss. I also started taking extra Vitamin C...and I as I was taking my Gummi Vitamin C this morning I read the label. What the heck....the Vitamin C Gummi's have 15 calories each....what???? I have to figure in the calories of the vitamins too??? What is up with that???

I have two more days of my 14 day cleanse, and as I was mixing my apple juice in with my cleanse this morning (because it tastes GROSS with water, and was recommended), I read the label....it had 110 calories in the juice per 8 oz serving (which is what I use)....so once again, I have not been counting this as calories. I have definitely been going over my calorie limit. I have probably been at 2000 calories a day, I am so surprised I didn't gain this week. But then again with the cleanse, everything comes out...seriously.

I have done pretty ok with my workout. I worked out with Tammy on Saturday and Sunday morning, both 2 miles on treadmill and 2x the circuit on the weights. Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday & Thursday morning I did a mile on the treadmill before work. Monday night I did 2 miles, Tuesday I worked late so didn't get a second walk in, Wednesday night I did 2.5 miles, and Thursday I just didn't feel good and passed on the second walk. When I work out alone I don't have the extra push to go further. I'm also tired after working all day, so I think walking a second time is pretty darn good....but I could probably do more if I pushed myself.

I do plan to stop on my way home and at least walk 2 miles. Food has been good today, been watching it more carefully, but I think we will be going out to eat tonight so you never know what that will bring. Will start counting calories again tomorrow. I think 1250 - 1300 calories is good for me.

With the holidays coming up it is so hard to focus on weight loss, but I will be very mindful of this. I already have an exercise plan in place. The gym that Tammy and I work out at will be closed on Thanksgiving and I think they said they have short hours on the Friday after. So I still have my 24 hour gym membership and I will be working out Thanksgiving morning. We will be going to Shane's parents for Thanksgiving and the 24 hour gym is just down the street, so I will be stopping by there to do 2 or 2.5 miles on the treadmill before lunch. Then, depending on the hours, I will go on Friday morning and again Friday evening. I will also work out on Wednesday night prior to the big day. So hopefully this will help me not gain a lot. I also have an eating plan. I will have white meat turkey, only 1 or 2 slices, and only a spoonful of everything else (Tammy had suggested this when she went to a family get together earlier, and it seemed to work for her).

I don't have any family here (just me and my kids), so there will be no family get togethers, it will just be lunch with Shane's parents. Hopefully there will not be a lot of leftovers sent home with us. Sometimes it's sad not having any family around, but there is no use in getting depressed over thing I have no control over.

My short term goal, as I will not be seeing any of my family until at least spring, is to be at least half way to my goal weight by spring. So that will be 46 pounds gone or a weight of 176. I also have a big convention that my company attends in April. This will be another opportunity to show off the new me. All of the managers from out of town attend this convention, and I only see them once a year. This is also a great time to get some new clothes, as we have a hospitality cocktail party and a semi-formal dinner also. Of course by then none of my last year clothes will fit, so I will have to buy something new and very flattering.

So even though the holidays are right around the corner, my goals go beyond that and I will meet these goals. This will keep me on track during the holidays. I CAN DO IT !!!!!!!!!!!!! With a little help from my friend and a lot of God's help.

Right now I'm still at work and must get some things done, so more later...

Battle of the Bulge - Week 7

2009-11-07T11:11:00.003-05:00

Yeah for me....Lost 3.1 pounds this week, so that puts me at 206.4. Can't wait to get down into the ones. I have decided my reward for getting to the ones is I'm getting my hair done. It's been almost 6 months since I have had my hair done, and it needs to be done BAD. I have a problem with things that I need to have done, I never have the money and the time at the same time. Now if the kids need something, that's another story, they make you make time for their priorities. So no matter what that is my goal (hopefully in the next 2 weeks - only 6.4 pounds to go).

This is the second week of my colon cleanse. And for Sheilagh, it's not painful. It's not a colonic where they force some kinda water substance into your rectum and everything comes out. They did one of those on Tyra the week I was at home. It is a fiber powder that I mix with apple juice, and it cleans you out. And I must say it really works. Now, I'm not one that examines my bodily excretions, but just had to peek to see if it was really working. And yep, everything is coming out.

Had some great workouts this week with Tammy, doing cardio and strength training also. Just got back from one of those. I haven't been able to walk my mile in the morning this past week because I've been running late and having to go by and let my future inlaws dogs out. But dad is out of the hospital now and I'll be getting back to my routine and walk on my way to work. I feel so much more energized when I workout in the mornings, and then when I workout at night I sleep like a log. Tammy didn't workout with my on Thursday or Friday night, and I just don't push myself as much when she's not there.

I did start the Couch to 5k program last night while at the gym, but I could only run 4 of the 9 runs. I did it again today, and also did 4 of the 9 runs. So I've done Week 1 - Day 1 two days in a row. I will work up to all 9 runs, gotta start slow. After all I've only been exercising for 5 weeks. Prior to that my only exercise was raising my fork to mouth and now I'm doing 2 to 3 miles a day at least 5 days a week.

I haven't really been counting my calories these past two weeks, but have been doing pretty good. I know what I'm supposed to eat and if I just eat what I know I'm supposed eat I would be great. I don't have any particular cravings, so if I stick with what I know I do pretty well. But I do need to get back to the calorie counting so I know exactly how many calories I'm taking in versus what I'm burning.

The plan for the day is to clean out the closet, shrimp/spinach quesadillas for lunch, church and chicken something for dinner.

Quote for the Day - A goal without a plan is just a wish.

Now take on the day....(heard that somewhere, but don't know where)

Whatever happened to Thanksgiving

2009-11-05T20:33:00.002-05:00

As I drove through town tonight, I noticed that all the Halloween decorations had been taken down and had been replaced with Christmas decorations. What is this all about??? When I was growing up it was unheard of to have your Christmas decorations up before Thanksgiving night. We would go to downtown Atlanta and watch the lighting of the Great Christmas tree and then come home and put up our own tree. What has become of this life I once knew? Everyone has become so busy and everything goes by so fast. I guess everyone is trying to keep up the fast pace.

Ok enough of that rant....now on to the weight loss.

This week has not been quite as hectic, but I have been busy. Tammy and I have worked out together three day in a row, doing both cardio and weights. And boy am I feeling it. I did my cardio alone tonight.

I have been watching what I eat but have not been counting all the calories, but ever mindful of how many calories I am consuming.

I also started a colon cleanse last Sunday. It's a 14 day cleanse, and until today has not really been that bad. However, today it was unpredictable. I had to run from my office a couple of times and it interrupted my walk tonight, and had to stop half way go to the bathroom and come back.

So I'm hoping that all the exercise, good eating, colon cleanse and all the water I drink, will result in a good loss tomorrow morning. But only the scale will tell.

Quote of the day - There are two ways of attaining an important end, force and perseverance; the silent power of the latter grows irresistible with time.

2009-10-28T19:55:00.002-04:00

My very first award, Thanks so much to Tammy at Fat to Fab. I love it.

Now I'm supposed to pass it on to 7 people who are deserving. This is hard because I feel all are deserving.

But here goes:

Kandice @ No more Chunky Dunking, time to Skinny Dip

Georgia Mist @ Gathering My Roses

Dawne @ 365 Days to a New Me

MaryFran @ A New Start: Losing Weight

Tina @ Fat Girl Dives In

What A Splurge

Amy @ The Not So Secret Life of a Not So Super Together Mom

And then I have to tell 6 interesting things about myself.....lets see.

1) I love dogs - I have 5 - All were rescued.

2) I have been married and divorced twice.

3) I have been on every diet known to woman.

4) I actually used to work out with a trainer - I still remember some things.

5) I have had the same job for 20 years.

6) I hate being alone, but I love being alone.

Now on to the blog...

Lets see its been forever since I posted, well not forever, but seems like it.

This has been a weird week, hectic and tiring.

Weigh In was Friday (Changed from Saturday), gained a pound. Not too bad but was hoping for a loss.

Saturday morning 3:30 Shane's mom calls to say his dad was rushed to the emergency room and had coded. They brought him back, but his heart kept spiking and they couldn't stabilize him. So he was admitted to the hospital.

Sunday we were to go to Tammy's mom's retirement party in Ellijay. Had my oatmeal for breakfast, went to the hospital, forgot about lunch, saved my calories for the party - Chicken & Potato Salad, then got an unexpected call shortly after we arrived saying they had to shock Shane's dad again. So we flew to the hospital, and I missed dinner. By the time we left it was just too late to eat dinner, so I had a small bowl of Special K and went to bed.

All this also meant no time for workout.

Monday, had to go back to work. I was so tired and slept through the alarm, which meant no workout on the way to work. I did well with Breakfast and Lunch at work, and I think I had enough water. Went to the hospital to see Dad. He had a Heart Cath today. Late getting home again, so no dinner.

Tuesday, work again, still tired, slept through the alarm again. So no workout on the way to work again. Did well with Breakfast and Lunch at work. Then back to the hospital to see Dad. Late getting home again, but was hungry. Found some mini candy bars in the pantry (that Shane left), so I ate 4 of them. Probably not a good idea that late at night.

Wednesday, work again, woke up when the alarm went off, but couldn't get up because I was so tired. Breakfast was good, but started getting nauseous by lunch, so I skipped lunch. Dad had a heart ablasion (sp?) today, where they burned off the dead parts of his heart. He came through the procedure great. I didn't go to the hospital tonight because I was still feeling nauseous and I don't want to give Dad anything, just in case it's a stomach virus. But I also did not go workout.

I plan to start working out again on Friday, hopefully. I just feel like I need to be with Shane and his family during this time, so it's hard to get in everything that needs to be done.

So now I'm sitting here at home, not really feeling like eating but I ate a grilled cheese sandwich. And now I'm off to bed.

Quote for the Day - There is abundant testimony that if we choose love rather than self, we gain immeasurably.

ONE MONTH - Battle of the Bulge

2009-10-22T10:10:00.002-04:00

As of yesterday, I have been on this journey for a month. I will however, do my one month weigh in on Friday. So we will see how GOOD I have done then. No matter what it is it is all GOOD. I feel that just my moving more is a great accomplishment, and I feel good, so it's gotta be good.

Tammy and I joined the gym yesterday. Yes I know I just joined a gym a week or so ago, but it's better to do it with someone. It is great, because it's more motiviation. I only join month to month gyms, no long term contract. So I will cancel the other membership.

Last night we worked on the machines and only did 1 rep of 15 each, and then walked on the treadmill. I am very motivated working out with Tammy. She has been at this a little longer than I have so she's more advanced at the walking/jogging than I am. I think I was just lucky she hurt her knee and wasn't going 4 miles last night...lol. We did 2.2 or so, I was ready to stop at 1, but I kept going, and I felt so accomplished when I was done. I will start incorporating the jogging into my walking soon, I was walking faster last night and I probably could have jogged some but that will come soon enough.

I have been working at home this week and it is much harder to keep track of what I'm eating. I am aware, but there are so many more choices. When I'm at work I pack my food to take with me, and that's all there is, no extra munchies. And I do not visit the vending machines, I steer clear of that room at all costs. At home there's way too much to tempt me, and knowing the groceries have to last two weeks does not usually deter me. I actually bought some 100 calorie Weight Watchers lemon cakes, and I have not even opened them, talk about will power.

I also find I don't drink as much water when I'm at home for some reason. I just get busy and don't go to the fridge and get it. At work I'm looking at the computer all day, so I have to just walk away sometimes and that is when I go and refill my water bottle.

But all in all my food hasn't been that bad this week, I actually only bought good food when I got groceries. My son of course has to have not so good food, because he's a growing boy, but the next two weeks he's gonna eat good.

So I haven't really been counting my calories, I just kinda keep a running total in my head. Which right now is getting to be tough, I have so many numbers running in my head...I try not to think of much when I'm not working because there are so many numbers I work with, it just makes my head hurt.

So for yesterday, food was good, water not bad. Today so far had my Oatmeal, 12 grain toast and a banana, and a bottle of water. So far so good.

Gotta get to work now, more later.

Battle of the Bulge - Day 27 - WEIGH DAY

2009-10-17T21:57:00.002-04:00

WooHoo I am down 4 pounds this week, down to 209. That makes 13 total lost. Not too bad for mother nature rearing her ugly head also. I was hoping for more, but I'll take it.

Today was not a bad day entirely. I did well with breakfast, Oatmeal and a Banana. Lunch was Spinach & Shrimp Quesadilla on Wheat tortilla. But then, we went to church and the Coffee Bar was a callin' me...because it was so cold. So I had a Dark Raspberry Mocha which is, oh heck I have no idea how many calories but I know its not good. AND not only did I have one, but during the half hour wait for the second service (while Shane is doing the parking duty) I had to have another one. SO two Dark Raspberry Mochas in one day, is probably way over my calories. BUT I did make a delicious dinner which was only 327 calories, Creamy Chicken & Wild Rice which I put in the crock pot and simmered all day.

AND I did not work out today. I had every intention of working out, drove to the gym and the power was out. Couldn't even get in. And we were looking for Shane a new car today, so I didn't get back by there later in the day. But I did drink lots of water.

Plan for tomorrow - Work out in the morning, make homemade pizza for lunch and Prayer Meeting tomorrow night where we are having Chicken Spaghetti. Water, Water and more water.

Battle of the Bulge - Day 26

2009-10-16T21:21:00.004-04:00

So to start out my morning today, my alarm goes off and I was prepared to get up early and go workout. I turned on the news while I was waking up, and the power went off. I looked out the window to see if other lights were off in the neighborhood, and I could have sworn I saw a light shining in my bedroom window. I went to the door, and saw nothing. I think it was just the guy up the street walking his dogs. Turns out the power went off on my street for some reason. But this did not deter me from my mission at hand, I got a candle, took my shower and went to the gym. Walked my mile and 5 minutes on the elliptical before going to work.

While I was at the gym today I saw a paper on eating fiber to lose fat, which was exactly what I thought I was doing, but as noted in my post the other day, sometimes this is not pretty. As I am reading it says "Just heed the warnings: take it slow if you don't eat much fiber. Adding too much fiber at one time can cause bloating, gas and other uncomfortable stomach problems." What warning?? There were no warnings given to me. I go on to read about the fiber and how to get more fiber into your diet without even trying. And it appears that apples, bananas & popcorn fall into this category. So not only was I having the FiberOne Muffin with my oatmeal, but I was also having a banana. Then I have apples and popcorn for my snack. No wonder I exploded. The only thing I can say is I better lose some weight this week.

I have found that EVERYTHING has sodium in it, even milk. Since I have been counting calories, I look carefully at the sodium content, and I am very surprised at the sodium levels in everything. Why does everything have sodium? I have never cooked with salt, and if I buy canned vegetables I always buy the ones with no salt added.

I have NSVs to report also.

When I bought milk this week, my son was with me, and I reached for the 1% milk because I'm trying to get the kids down to the skim without shock. My son says to me, "why don't you just get the skim? we used to always get that". Which is right, I had actually raised the kids on skim milk, but when I got married my husband did not like skim, and we had to go to 2%.

I pulled my jacket out of the closet today and went to zip it up and it actually fit, without being snug. Last year I wouldn't zip it up because the elastic band at the bottom came right under my belly and made me look pregnant. Now it just hangs. I was so excited.

ALSO, I got my jeans out last weekend, and they actually fit. I haven't worn these jeans in over a year. My son actually asked me one time why I always wore jeans that had elastic in it, and all I could say was "Because I'm fat, and they are comfortable". My jeans are no longer tight and I can breathe when I sit down.

I think I stayed within my calories today, I have not tracked the past three days, but I am conscious of what what I'm eating and running the calories in my head. It is much easier to do it on the computer, but I have been so busy with work, that I haven't had time to figure it up.

So I'm hoping for at least 3 pounds when I weigh in tomorrow. I'll post then and let ya know. For now, I am so tired and I am ready to go to bed.

Myspace Quotes, Positive Quotes at WishAFriend.com

Do I Really Look Like That?

2009-10-14T22:27:00.002-04:00

I watched the Biggest Loser last night, and I'm looking at them at the weigh in and some of them weigh what I weigh, and I'm saying to myself I don't look like that...but then who actually thinks they look as fat and flabby as they really do. And the sports bras and bicycle shorts...I wouldn't be caught outside my house, let alone on national tv, in my shape. AND...I don't think I would kill myself working out like they do, I mean really push, push, push then pass out??? I guess that's why I won't lose that big 8 or 16 pounds in a week. My daughter actually wanted us to try out for that show at one time, and I considered it for about...until I actually watched the show, and then no way am I going to punish myself like that.

So I say to myself...Is that really what I look like? and self says YES, yes you do look like that, and you need to do something about it. My self is always brutally honest...lol

Yesterday I worked out before work - 1 mile on the treadmill and 30 crunches. I'm pressed for time on my way to work, which is the reason I only do one mile.

Then I stopped again on my way home - only 2 miles on the treadmill and 15 minutes on the elliptical.

Today I did not work out - I took the day off from working out, but I'll be back at it in the morning.

My calorie count yesterday was good. I'm trying to work more into my menu, so I can at least get the 1500 calories for consistency. However, the past two mornings I have had a FiberOne blueberry muffin, which are very delicious. Now, I usually need a little more fiber, and usually fiber in foods don't work, but dang, those muffins worked and by the 1 hour ride home, I was regretting the fiber from today. Had to stop half way home, and thought I would not make it, but thankfully did.

Now I'm off to bed, tired today.

Quote of the day - and this is hit right at home, because of my little talk with self last night.

Don't undermine your worth by comparing yourself with others. It is because we are different that each of us is special.

I've Been Doing it all wrong

2009-10-12T19:46:00.002-04:00

I had a very eye opening day today. I went to the gym for my fitness and nutrition consultation. I learned alot about me during this consult.

1. I can walk a mile on the treadmill at 3.5 mph in only 17 minutes and not die.

2. I am not eating enough calories. She says I need to be eating between 1650 and 1900. Dear Lord, how do you eat that many calories and lose weight. I'd have to eat 5 300 calorie meals a day and have 5 100 calorie snacks. I'm having a tough time getting in 1500 every day.

3. My BMI is 42.55% and it should be 22 to be healthy. (I knew this was not going to be good)

4. I have a poor heart rate. Walking a mile at 3.5 mph my heart rate was only 126 and it should be 141-150 to effectively burn calories.

5. Strength training really hurts. I guess it's not supposed to, but...when you haven't really done any in a long time, it hurts.

6. And the real shocker...I am obese. (Ok I already knew that too)

So it appears that the 2.5 miles I walk in an hour is really not that good. I thought I was burning calories, but apparently I am not. I thought the point was to eat less and move more, but I think I may have been wrong on that point also.

Now not to mention, mother nature is paying a visit, and I feel like crap and don't really feel like working out. But the fatty me would just stay in bed and use this as an excuse, but the skinny me will be pushing on and go and work out and do at least a mile at 3.5, then I may slow down a little, cuz I thought my leg was gonna fall off.

I have decided that when I get to the 10 pound lost marker - I am buying the armband for my IPhone so I have no more mishaps with the flying phone. So hopefully I am hitting the 10 pound mark this week.

			Free Calorie Counter my-calorie-counter.com
			Cal	Fat	Sat	Chl	Sod	Crb	Fib	Sug	Pro
Breakfast
1	cup	Milk, nonfat, fluid, with added vitamin A (fat free or skim)	83	0	0	5	103	12	0	12	8
1	serving	Oatmeal	150	3	1	0	0	27	4	1	5
			233	3	1	5	103	39	4	13	13
Lunch
1	serving	Weight Watchers Smart Ones - Angel Hair Marinara	230	4	1	0	640	40	4	7	9
			230	4	1	0	640	40	4	7	9
Dinner
1	Serving - 311 G	HEALTHY CHOICE DINNER - DINNER - CHICKEN PARMIGIANA 11 OZ BOX	320	9	3	20	600	40	6	10	20
			320	9	3	20	600	40	6	10	20
Snack
1	1 Container	Fiber One Vanilla Yogurt	50	0	0	0	55	13	5	4	3
1	Serving - 38 G	ORVILLE REDENBACHER'S - MICROWAVE POPCORN - SMART POP BUTTER 94% FAT FREE 3 OZ 3 PK BOX	110	2	0	0	360	26	6	0	4
1	cup	Grapes, red or green (European type, such as Thompson seedless), raw	104	0	0	0	3	27	1	23	1
			264	2	0	0	418	66	12	27	8
Water Tracker

Totals Target Balance			1047 1500 70 453	18 65 28 47	5 20 25 15	25 300 8 275	1761 2400 73 639	185 300 62 115	26 25 104 1	57 50 114 7	50 50 100 0

			Cal	Fat	Sat	Chl	Sod	Crb	Fib	Sug	Pro
Activity

Totals			0

Quote of the day - Acceptance is not submission; it is acknowledgement of the facts of a situation. Then deciding what you're going to do about it.

Check out my daughter's weight loss blog too.

2009-10-11T21:36:00.002-04:00

She needs motivation and encouragement.

http://desperatelyseekingthin.blogspot.com/

Battle of the Bulge - Day 21

2009-10-11T20:44:00.002-04:00

The weekend is always very busy for me, because I work all week and don't have time to do anything around the house. My boyfriend spends most weekends with me, so I am cooking for him, but he's pretty much conditioned to eating low fat, low calorie foods so he's good with that. If he wants something that's not necessarily healthy, I'll make it for him and I'll make me something else, but this really doesn't happen alot. Since I have started working out I get up make breakfast go work out while he catches up on his emails or whatever it is he's doing on his computer, then we get on with our day.

Today I worked out this morning, 2.5 miles on the treadmill and 30 crunches and then this afternoon my son wanted to go for a bike ride. Now I do not own a bike, so I walked. We went to the Allatoona Pass trail, the trail is out 1.25 miles and then back, for a total of 2.5 miles. Now I know why I do the treadmill at the gym, because I just wouldn't do that everyday. There are rocks that you step on and twist your ankle, mosquitoes, gnats, etc. I mean don't get me wrong I love nature, I just think nature does not love me. I am more for the modern conveniences.

I can really tell I've been working out in my legs and my back. So all in all for today I did 5 miles, I think it may be easier to do it at two different times, then it doesn't seem like it's all that much at once.

So Yay for the exercise part of my day.

My foods for the day, still staying under my calorie limit of 1500. So its just been an all around good day.

			Free Diet Log my-calorie-counter.com
			Cal	Fat	Sat	Chl	Sod	Crb	Fib	Sug	Pro
Breakfast
1	serving	Oatmeal	150	3	1	0	0	27	4	1	5
1	cup	Milk, nonfat, fluid, with added vitamin A (fat free or skim)	83	0	0	5	103	12	0	12	8
			233	3	1	5	103	39	4	13	13
Lunch
1	serving	Oven Roasted Turkey Breast	90	5	2	30	680	2	0	1	9
1	serving	Small Tortilla	100	3	1	0	290	16	1	1	3
1	serving	Swiss Cheese	110	9	0	30	130	0	0	0	8
0.5	serving	Raspberry Ginger Ale	70	0	0	0	30	19	0	19	0
			370	17	3	60	1130	37	1	21	20
Dinner
1	1 meal 10.5 oz	Healthy Choice® - Traditional Turkey Breasts - frozen entree	320	5	2	30	600	49	5	23	20
			320	5	2	30	600	49	5	23	20
Snack
1	Serving - 38 G	ORVILLE REDENBACHER'S - MICROWAVE POPCORN - SMART POP BUTTER 94% FAT FREE 3 OZ 3 PK BOX	110	2	0	0	360	26	6	0	4
1	1 Container	Fiber One Vanilla Yogurt	50	0	0	0	55	13	5	4	3
1	serving	Super Fruit Cup	70	0	0	0	10	18	2	14	1
			230	2	0	0	425	57	13	18	8
Water Tracker

Totals Target Balance			1153 1500 77 347	27 65 42 38	6 20 30 14	95 300 32 205	2258 2400 94 142	182 300 61 118	23 25 92 2	75 50 150 25	61 50 122 11

			Cal	Fat	Sat	Chl	Sod	Crb	Fib	Sug	Pro
Activity

Totals			0

Well it has been a long day, and I am so tired so I'm headed to the shower and then to bed. Don't forget to check out my daughter's blog (listed in my blog roll) No more Chunky Dunking time to Skinny Dip.

My quote - One of the greatest tragedies of the average person is the tendency to spend our whole lives perfecting our faults.

Battle of the Bulge - Day 20

2009-10-11T11:25:00.002-04:00

I weigh in on Saturday, but did not blog yesterday, so the scale said 213, so I'm down .5 for this week or a total of 9 pounds. I didn't get to exercise yesterday, although I could have, I had many things to do around the house and then church. So I just didn't get there. I know just another excuse. However, I got up this morning, ate breakfast and went and worked out. Walked 2.5 miles on the treadmill and did 30 crunches.

I really must get an armband for my Ipod, as I'm walking on the treadmill today, really getting into the walking, great song, 35 minutes in - I snag the cord and my phone flies across the room. Luckily there was only one other person there so not much embarrassment, but it distracted from the rest of the workout.

I am also very excited that my daughter has started a blog also, "No more CHUNKY DUNKING, time to skinny dip!" so everybody go check her out and follow her, she needs the motivation.

That's all for now, got things to do, be back later with my calorie log.

Quote for day - When we dream alone, it is only a dream. But when we dream together, it is the beginning of a new reality.

Battle of the Bulge - Day 19

2009-10-09T20:22:00.002-04:00

I did it...I actually got up early today and went to the gym before work. I walked a mile on the treadmill and did 5 minutes on the ellipitical. Then after work I stopped there on my way home and walked a mile and a half and did 10 minutes on the ellipitical. Now I'm pooped.

I must say that I love my boyfriend so much. He is so encouraging. He doesn't tell me that he loves me just the way I am and I don't need to lose weight, but he doesn't tell me I don't either. He just cheers me on with my endeavors. I think this is the reason I would lose and gain back before, I never had anyone who just cheered me on. They either told me I didn't need to lose weight or they criticized me. I am very happy in my relationship and I think that really helps me with my daily weight loss. We had talked about me working out in the mornings before I go to work, and he said I should probably work up to it. But this morning I got up 30 minutes earlier and just did it. I was so excited I had to text him as soon as I got done, and he said "Cool, you go babe". I just love him.

I did good with my calories today. I haven't figured them all up yet, but I made the best jambalya tonight. I used brown rice instead of white and used turkey kiebasa instead of beef. The boyfriend loved it.

I weigh in tomorrow, so we'll see if the day of exercise burned enough calories to have a loss.

Quote for the day - If you don't know what you want, you won't recognize it when you get it.

I DID IT !!! I DID IT !!!

2009-10-08T19:13:00.003-04:00

I did it, today I joined the gym. I joined a 24 hour gym so I have no excuses not to go. It's a month to month, no contract membership, so if things go awry with my job, I can still get out of it. Which was a big concern to me right now. My job that is, because our company is being sold and no jobs are guaranteed.

I will start tomorrow on my way home with at least walking on the treadmill and doing some elliptical. Ideally I would like to stop on my way to work and on my way home, but I don't know if I can actually do that. We'll see how it goes, but I think I should start slow and work my way up. I haven't actually done any physical exertion in probably 4 years.

I did have a comment on my earlier blog about working out at home. Thank you for your comment, however, that's just not me. I really don't have a lot of room, and I have a teenage son who thinks its very funny to see mom flailing around the house alleging it is a workout, so I just wouldn't do it. I have all the videos, the balls, the stretching bands, just can't bring myself to do it.

My calories are still good, and I feel with the added exercise I will be able to succeed.

My Food Journal -

			Free Diet Tracker my-calorie-counter.com
			Cal	Fat	Sat	Chl	Sod	Crb	Fib	Sug	Pro
Breakfast
1	cup, quartered or chopped	Apples, raw, with skin	65	0	0	0	1	17	3	13	0
1	serving	Oatmeal	150	3	1	0	0	27	4	1	5
1	cup	Milk, nonfat, fluid, with added vitamin A (fat free or skim)	83	0	0	5	103	12	0	12	8
			298	3	1	5	104	56	7	26	13
Lunch
1	serving	Lean Cuisine Baja-Style Chicken Quesadilla	280	8	3	20	690	34	8	3	18
			280	8	3	20	690	34	8	3	18
Dinner
1	serving	Moe's Naked Triple Lindy	525	22	12	120	1205	37	15	2	38
			525	22	12	120	1205	37	15	2	38
Snack
1	cup	Grapes, red or green (European type, such as Thompson seedless), raw	104	0	0	0	3	27	1	23	1
			104	0	0	0	3	27	1	23	1
Water Tracker

Totals Target Balance			1207 1500 80 293	33 65 51 32	16 20 80 4	145 300 48 155	2002 2400 83 398	154 300 51 146	31 25 124 6	54 50 108 4	70 50 140 20

			Cal	Fat	Sat	Chl	Sod	Crb	Fib	Sug	Pro
Activity

Totals			0

My Quote for the day - Most of the critical things in life, which become the starting points of human destiny, are little things.

Battle of the Bulge - Day 19

2009-10-08T11:38:00.002-04:00

Ok I must start working out. I did check out the Curves facility near my house, while convenient to my house, I drive an hour home and they close at 7, so if I get caught in traffic I would never make it to work out. Then that's just another excuse, although not entirely my fault I wouldn't do something else after battling traffic and getting home late. HOWEVER, I did watch some people doing their workout, as the girl was demonstrating the machines. Shane says this really doesn't count as a workout though. LOL

I also homeschool my son, so with working full time, homeschooling, trying to have a social life and working out, I really don't have a lot of time. But I am going to do this. I am going to work out, I am going to keep on track with my eating and finally win the battle.

I am going to check out another workout facility on my way home today, Snap Fitness. It is a 24 hour place, so if I get caught in traffic I could still work out. This will be an ok fix for now, I know they have treadmills and elipitical thingy, but once I really start losing I want to be able to tone up my arms, legs and abs. This is why I am checking it out before I commit, I don't know what kind of equipment they have. I really kind of like the Curves atmosphere because it's a circuit where you do different parts of your body, and most is low impact, which is what I need. I have plantar fasciitis, which is a shortening of the tendons in your foot. I have it in both feet which is really painful if I'm walking for long periods of time. Therefore, the need for low impact.

I am doing good with the calorie intake, so my only problem is the workout. Gotta get this going.

Quote for the Day - Do your best every day, and your life will gradually expand into satisfying fullness.

Rainy, Dreary Monday

2009-10-05T19:50:00.002-04:00

Well it has been a very dreary Monday. Monday's are bad enough without the dreary rain. It has been a busy day at work, but I don't overeat when I'm busy. I have decided that I may change my calorie limit to 1250, because I really don't eat 1500 calories and I'm really not hungry. Tonight in looking at my calorie counter, I see that I could have had a large sandwich instead of a regular from Firehouse Subs, but I'm really not hungry at all after eating the regular. I'm not really sure how to decide what my calorie range should be.

I did not start my exercise today, and as I look back it, I once again had an excuse. Well, two excuses....1. it was cold and drizzly outside so I couldn't walk 2. I had a migraine when I got home. I am definitely looking into joining a gym tomorrow. I'm thinking Curves or the Ladies Fitness Center, I don't like working out with all the macho men lifting weights.

Now I must say something about my boyfriend. My boyfriend's name is Shane, he is the sweetest guy I know. He is my best friend, and I can tell him anything. He wrote about me in his blog last night which made me cry. Tears of happiness, not sadness. I am a very emotional person. I think he wrote this because I said my friend's boyfriend wrote her a romantic email, he's about to be deployed to Iraq, which I think implied I thought he was not romantic. I was not meaning he was not romantic, he is romantic, and I really love him a lot. He is really supportive of my weight loss journey.

Here's my calorie count for the day -

			Free Fat Counter my-calorie-counter.com
			Cal	Fat	Sat	Chl	Sod	Crb	Fib	Sug	Pro
Breakfast
1	cup	Milk, nonfat, fluid, with added vitamin A (fat free or skim)	83	0	0	5	103	12	0	12	8
2	0.75 oz	Post® - Grape Nuts Flakes - breakfast cereal	150	2	2	0	240	34	2	4	4
			233	2	2	5	343	46	2	16	12
Lunch
1	serving	Lean Cuisine Cheese Lasagna & Chicken	270	8	2	30	590	33	3	9	17
			270	8	2	30	590	33	3	9	17
Dinner
1	1 sandwich 299g	Firehouse Subs® - Medium Sub - Turkey (4 oz of meat) - with smoked turkey breast	350	3	0	40	1780	53	2	5	28
1	serving	Diet Dr. Pepper	0	0	0	0	55	0	0	0	0
			350	3	0	40	1835	53	2	5	28
Snack
1	1 Container	Fiber One Vanilla Yogurt	50	0	0	0	55	13	5	4	3
1	serving	Del Monte Fruit Naturals Red Grapefruit	120	0	0	0	15	16	0	13	0
			170	0	0	0	70	29	5	17	3
Water Tracker

Totals Target Balance			1023 1500 68 477	13 65 20 52	4 20 20 16	75 300 25 225	2838 2400 118 438	161 300 54 139	12 25 48 13	47 50 94 3	60 50 120 10

			Cal	Fat	Sat	Chl	Sod	Crb	Fib	Sug	Pro
Activity

Totals			0

Here's my quote for the day (I do quotes because reading several blogs I see they have quotes, and this sounds like a good idea. A quote to live by)-

The place to improve the world is first in one's own heart, head and hands, and then work outward from there.

Second Day of Blogging

2009-10-04T20:21:00.002-04:00

Well today has been a less than successful day in the eating area. I did so bad I didn't even put it in my calorie counter. However, tomorrow is another day. Weekends aren't usually this bad, because my boyfriend is very supportive and will eat whatever I make, he's really not picky. This weekend, however, there was lunch at his parents today (Pot Roast) and then prayer meeting, where we always eat and tonight was Lasagna.

I will just look to the week ahead, busy at work so I won't over eat, in fact sometimes it's hard to actually fit in lunch. But I will make it a priority to work in all my foods and snacks. I'm hoping to actually start exercising tomorrow. I know the weight loss is just water loss right now and will not last so I need to start exercising.

**Make no excuses. You don't have time, because if you use energy that way, you won't have any energy to deal with what you need to deal with, which is overcoming obstacles and obtaining your goals. - Frances Williams.**

In the beginning

2009-10-03T22:54:00.002-04:00

This is going to be a story of journey to a healthy lifestyle. I want to accomplish this by the time I'm 45. They say that the weight you are at when you hit menopause is the weight you will remain the rest of your life. I hope this is not true, but do not want to take any chances, so I'm starting now to get rid of it.

I am 43 years old, I have a 22 year old daughter and a 17 year old son. I am divorced, and have a boyfriend, Shane. As you can imagine with a teenage son in the house it is nearly impossible to avoid all temptation, as they eat anything all the time. I try to keep all the junk food out of the house, but somehow it manages to sneak in somehow.

I am just like many of you out there, I have done every weight loss plan (Jenny Craig, Weight Watchers, etc...) I even had a personal trainer at one time, but nothing really worked. I would get discouraged when I hit the plateaus and just give it all up, gaining back the weight I had lost and then some.

I have been following my friend Tammy's blog and she is very inspirational and motivating.

I have decided at this point in my life I need to do something. I have aches and pains everywhere and I can't even walk up the driveway without running out of breath. So I have made the ultimate decision to start losing weight the right way. I started on September 21st, weighing 222 pounds. Now I know what everyone would be thinking at 5'1" that is just too much to weigh. I've always had the philosophy that I'm not overweight, I'm just under tall. But is that really a healthy way to think, not really. So here I am, starting over. The only thing different this time is I'm really going to do it this time, FOR GOOD.

I know what I need to do. I have always known what I need to do, just doing it is the hard part. I'm always making excuses for not doing it, too much going on, not enough time, you know all the excuses. I know what I am supposed to eat, but I don't, it's just easier to do the convenient thing. But this is all changing now.

I have been counting my calories, and am staying pretty well within my calorie limit of 1500. My kids say I'm obsessed with this calorie counting thing. I count every calorie, and list out everything, if we have to eat out, I have to pull out my iPhone and check my calorie counter to see what I can eat at a particular restaurant. Fast food has an astronomical amount of calories and sodium. But I make sure wherever we're going has something I can eat within my calorie range. My days of milkshakes and fast food burgers are over. Something that has really been hard to give up is Sweet Tea. It's a Southern staple with every meal and in between. When I went to Las Vegas I thought I was going to die because they do not have Sweet Tea. I have found that, out of habit, when we go into a restaurant I automatically order sweet tea when asked for my drink order. I am making more of an effort to just say water. I'm even trying to avoid diet drinks because that is added sodium. I have noticed that EVERYTHING has sodium in it, things you wouldn't imagine, like milk.

Since starting my dieting on September 21, I have lost 8.5 pounds, and really don't want to find it again. I still have not started exercising, because, of course, I have excuses. I have week knees, a torn tendon in my foot, I have plantar fasciitis (which keeps me from doing a lot on my feet), back pain, hip pain. My doctor says a lot of my problems would go away if I lose weight, but that's easier said than done. I am going to start exercising. I must exercise if I want to actually lose more and keep it off. I actually walked today, but it wasn't a steady walk. My boyfriend and I went to the Civil War reenactment, at Allatoona Pass, so we were walking the trails there, but there was a stop about every 5 minutes or so, so it wasn't a steady pace for 15 - 20 minutes. But hey I was moving, which is more than I do most days. Usually just getting out of bed is a feat all in itself.

I have read a lot of blogs and have decided this is a pretty good way of accountability. Even if no one reads it, I can look back and find out where I was and feel as if I was accountable to God and myself.

Life is all about change and I want this to be the best change of my life. Life is short, and I want to live it to the fullest. To do this I must be able to get there and not be short of breath.

Okay, I am going to publish my food journals and see what kind of feedback I get from that. So here is the one for today. I am under my calorie limit, so yea for me. I am doing good with my water, but sometimes still need something else. However, trying to just drink water. I try to eat fruit as my snack during the day, but have been so busy today that I haven't had any snacks.

			Free Food Diary my-calorie-counter.com
			Cal	Fat	Sat	Chl	Sod	Crb	Fib	Sug	Pro
Breakfast
1	cup	Milk, lowfat, fluid, 1% milkfat, with added vitamin A	102	2	2	12	107	12	0	13	8
1	serving	Special K w/Strawberries	110	0	0	0	220	25	1	10	3
			212	2	2	12	327	37	1	23	11
Lunch
1	serving	Smoked Turkey Breast	145	2	0	44	1155	3	0	3	29
2	serving	Natures Own Double Fiber Wheat Bread	200	3	0	0	380	44	12	6	10
2	Serving - 19 G	SARGENTO« - CHEESE - DELI STYLE PROVOLONE THIN SLICES 12 CT 8 OZ PEG	140	10	7	30	270	0	0	0	10
			485	15	7	74	1805	47	12	9	49
Dinner
1	serving	Stouffer's Easy Express Broccoli & Beef	350	6	3	25	1660	57	2	4	18
			350	6	3	25	1660	57	2	4	18
Snack

Water Tracker

Totals Target Balance			1047 1500 70 453	23 65 35 42	12 20 60 8	111 300 37 189	3792 2400 158 1392	141 300 47 159	15 25 60 10	36 50 72 14	78 50 156 28

			Cal	Fat	Sat	Chl	Sod	Crb	Fib	Sug	Pro
Activity

Totals			0

This is all I will write for tonight. I was so excited to get my blog started, that it is way past my bedtime. So I will leave you with this thought...

Trust yourself. Create the kind of self that you will be happy to live with all your life. Make the most of yourself by fanning the tiny, inner sparks of possibility into flames of achievement.